"Looking Death in the Eye" Episode 109/519
[TEASER]
Innkeeper [Inn]: "The usual?"
Old Joxer [O Jox]: "Mm-hmm."
Ramius [Ram]: "And-- sold! For 30 dinars!"
Drunk Man [D Man]: "Hey, Ramius-- what's the next item up for
bid? You can't be serious."
Ram: "Ah-h-h, but this isn't just any scroll."
D Man: [Sighs]
Ram: "No, my friends-- I have in my hand-- the last known scroll
transcribed by the bard of Poteidaiar [sic] herself! It
describes-- in breathtaking detail-- the final adventure of
Xena-- the legendary warrior princess, who _dared_ to defy the
gods!"
O Jox [Whispers]: "Let's see [Normal Voice]-- this is
Gabrielle's handwriting. This is real!"
Ram: "Ah, sure, it is!"
O Jox: "`Bard-- of Poteidaia.' You know, I-- I knew her. You
know, she was a friend of mine."
D Man: [Chuckles]
O Jox: "Xena was-- my friend, too."
D Man: "Xena was my housemaid."
[Laughter]
Ram: "Well, friend-- we'd best cut you off. What say I start
the bidding at-- "
D Man: "10 dinars!"
Man: "20 dinars!"
D Man: "25!"
O Jox: "Cover your tab!"
D Man: "You should talk, Joxer, ya deadbeat! 30!"
Man: "35 dinars!"
O Jox: "65 dinars! Sold!"
Ram: "65 dinars?!"
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O Meg's Voice: "Wait a minute! You spent _my_ nest egg-- on one
lousy piece of parchment?"
O Jox's Voice: "Please, Meg, it's Gabrielle's last scroll.
Maybe it explains what she and Xena were doing."
O Meg's Voice: "What do _you_ care?! Xena and Gabrielle are
gone! When are you gonna accept that?"
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O Jox: "O-K, that was a little too fast."
Boy: "Is that a story about the harpies, Daddy?"
Girl: "What is it? What is it?"
O Jox [Interrupts]: "No, it's, uh-- it's, um-- well-- it's a
story-- about a beautiful-- warrior princess. Wanna hear a story
about a beautiful warrior princess? OK. OK. [Clears throat.
Sighs] `Her, uh-- her celebrations-- at Thebes-- in Egypt-- were
cut short-- because Xena-- the mighty-- warrior princess--
fought-- both night and day, for the life of her newborn child--
as she continued to sing the rage-- of her Olympian foes.'"
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O Jox's Voice: "`Their ceaseless battles finally drove her to
the fates-- in search-- of answers.'"
X: "I hope you don't mind. We were in the neighborhood."
Lachesis [Lach]: "The fates always welcome you here, Xena.
We're pleasantly-- surprised."
X: "Finding your kid topping the list of Olympus' most wanted
makes you do some pretty surprising things. This is one of
them."
Clotho [Clo]: "You wish us to speak for your child. Your child,
Xena-- "
Atropos [Atr]: "-- will bring forth the twilight-- and usher in
a new beginning."
X: "Yes, I heard. I was hoping you could humor me with a date."
Clo: "The twilight will occur in time."
X: "That's not very specific."
Lach: "The time depends on you, Xena."
X: "What do you mean? It's me that determines when the twilight
begins? How?"
Atr: "You must die, Xena."
Clo: "Only in the essence of death-- will the child find
salvation-- and the twilight be set in motion. Until then, a
storm without end lies upon your path, and hers."
G: "You're saying that, the sooner Xena dies, the faster Eve
brings about the fall of the gods? [Whispers] No [Normal
Voice]-- Xena, let's go. Hey-- what are you doing? You're not
listening to them? Xena, you have said we _always_ determine our
own fate. It's not written for us. You've always believed
that."
X: "I still believe that, Gabrielle. So do they. It's the only
way. I have to die, Gabrielle."
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[ACT I]
X: "Sh-h-h-h-h-h-h. Quiet, now."
Hades: "Uh! Uh!"
X's Voice: "The helmet of invisibility."
G: "Hades."
X: "You're not really a hat kind 'a guy. Well, Athena, you can
call off your search. We found Hades for you."
Athena [Ath]: "Thank you, Xena-- but I think you know who we're
really here for. I have to give you credit, Xena. You three are
hard ones to catch up to-- for mortals."
X: "That's the beauty of being insignificant."
Ath: "Hand her over. I promise you, she won't feel a thing."
Hades: "There's no escape this time, Xena."
X: "We'll see about that."
[Fight]
G: "Xena! Toss Eve here!"
X: "No, Gabrielle!"
Ath: "What's wrong, Xena? No longer trust even Gabrielle to
protect your child?"
G: "Any ideas?"
X: "Yeah-- let's give them their hat back. Go, Gabrielle.
Let's go."
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Soldier's Voice: "Camp ready in five minutes, sir!"
O Jox's Voice: "`After narrowly escaping with our lives, we took
shelter for the night in the company of Octavius-- the new leader
of the Roman army-- and a new ally-- unknown to the gods."
Octavius [Oct]: "Can I get you two anything else?"
X: "No, Octavius-- thank you."
Oct: "You never have to thank me, Xena. I owe my life to you
and Gabrielle."
X: "All right. Come here."
G: "Ow! Ow. What _is_ that?"
X: "It's poison-- only if you drink it. A little dab'll stop
the spread of infection."
G: "Where did you get that?"
X: "Mom's medicine cabinet. Hs-s-s-s-s-s-s! Ah-h-h-h-h-h-h."
G: "Xena, what Athena said about, um-- your not trusting me with
Eve-- "
X: "Hey-- it's not a matter of trust where Athena's concerned.
Giving Eve to you would have bought her a few more seconds, but
we both know they would have killed her if they could have--
regardless of whose arms she was in. We got lucky. She's just a
baby."
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Ath: "Xena never dies. And why is that?"
Hephaestus [Heph]: "Just get her in my chains, Athena-- then
we'll see how long she lives."
Ath: "Thank you, Hephaeustus. Your-- youthful exuberance is
greatly appreciated."
Ares: "If you ask me, Sis-- and-- you haven't-- I can think of
no better expert to pose your query to than-- death-- herself."
Ath: "Celesta-- we're doing everything we can to ensure our
survival-- but we can't finish the job until you pay a visit to
Xena and her child."
Celesta [Cel]: "I'm sorry, Athena-- Ares-- and my beloved
brother, Hades-- but you know it's not in death's nature to
discriminate."
Ath: "Even when your own life is on the line?"
Cel: "As long as my flame continues to burn-- death will remain
a part of life for eternity, Athena."
Ath: "Meaning you might somehow be immune to the prophecy.
[Chuckles] If I didn't know better, I'd say Death's getting a
little cocky."
Cel: "Prophecy or not-- it is forbidden for any mortal to be
taken before their rightful time."
Ath: "Celesta!"
Ares: [Chuckles]
Ath: "We know you can't help but-- _care_-- for the mortals you
interact with so personally-- but just remember-- you can't deny
them their rightful time, either."
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X: "So, if you're the god of arts and crafts-- what do you do
for a hobby?"
Heph: "Help my family kill your child by first killing you,
Xena."
X: "No, that's a perversion-- not a hobby."
Heph: "Ah-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h!"
[Fight]
Heph: "How does it feel, Xena? How does it feel to finally be
in the presence of death herself?"
X: "What took you so long?"
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[ACT II]
G: "Xena! His chains!"
[Fight]
X: "I'm sorry, Celesta. I'm gonna have to ask you to stay.
Ah-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h! The chains of Hephaestus hold even the
gods."
Heph:
"Ah-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h
-h-h-h-h!"
G: "That was close."
Cel: "Xena-- what are you doing?"
X: "Check her hands."
G: "It worked. She can't touch us."
X: "Good."
Cel: "Your confrontation with Hephaestus-- that's exactly what
you wanted-- how you lured me to you."
X: "Believe me, lady, if there was a better way for us to hook
up, I'd have done it."
Cel: "Xena, how could you?"
X: "Gabrielle, get her outta here."
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G: "Celesta's secured."
X: "Good. Hey, sweetheart. Octavius, thanks for babysitting."
Oct: "Anytime."
X: "You're a good friend. We'll be seeing ya. Come on."
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Ath: "First-- there was Eli. The masses adored him and the
message he conveyed. You-- killed him."
Ares: "Again with the Eli. He had to die, Sis. How many times
do I have-- ?"
Ath: "His death sparked the uprising against us that Xena--
capitalized on at Amphipolis-- where _you_-- chose to fight at
her side, I might add. What's left to come?"
Heph: "Athena-- Xena took Celesta."
Ares: "Well-- I guess you got your answer."
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G [Sings]: "Hush now, my little one
Please don't you cry.
[Hums]
[Speaks] One day, you'll have your own horse."
Cel: "Xena, you should know that my brother-- and Athena, and
all Olympus will stop at nothing to find me."
X: "Then they'd better hurry up-- 'cause if I'm not mistaken,
Celesta-- when this candle burns out-- you die. Imagine that--
the death of Death herself-- and me and my kid will live
forever."
Cel: "Xena, this isn't like you-- or you, Gabrielle. At one
time, you both fought to free me."
X: "You're right. Somehow, motherhood has made me harder."
Cel: "Even giving birth to a child isn't enough to sway someone
so grounded in their beliefs."
X: "And how's that?"
Cel: "By holding me here-- you're condemning to eternal
suffering those who would otherwise find their peace."
X: "Lady, since we last met, I've decided you cause a lot more
suffering than you end."
Cel: "Death is nothing to fear, Xena-- for I only visit those
whose rightful time i-- "
X: "Rightful time?! Who decides when it's the rightful time?
You are at the beck and call of every warlord and murderer.
Solon-- my only son-- his rightful time came when someone else
decided it should-- and you came running-- no questions asked.
You didn't end the suffering of my little boy, Celesta. You
stole his life-- and Marcus-- and Lyceus."
Cel: "Your brother."
G: "Xena-- "
X [Interrupts]: "Lyceus-- Lyceus-- he wasn't just a brother, he
was my best friend. You know, growing up, he was everything to
me. He accepted me for who and what I was. And if you hadn't
taken him, he would have grown up to be something-- "
G [Interrupts]: "Xena, don't do this."
X [Whispers]: "What?"
G: "She's immortal. She'll never understand the pain of losing
someone."
X: "Yes, she will. Yes, she will-- 'cause you have a brother,
too."
Cel: "Yes-- Hades-- he's my only family-- the first to accept
_me_ for who and what I am. I may not agree with his recent
actions, Xena, but-- I believe he thinks he's doing what is
right. He's always been true to his convictions, and-- sometimes
that makes him a little-- stubborn-- but I believe it is his
noblest quality. To lose him-- is-- unthinkable."
X: "And what if he lost you? What would he say about that?"
Cel: "I may never know."
X: "Death _can_ end suffering, Celesta. Suffering just begins
for those left behind. I won't allow it any longer. I can't
lose what's left of my family-- and I won't lose another child."
G: "You know, she's right about one thing, Xena-- the gods will
stop at nothing. Holding Celesta prevents them from killing
anyone, but they'll inflict pain-- suffering-- "
X: "-- starting with the one most vulnerable."
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Woman's Voice: "Bartender! Another one!"
Jox: "Hey! Gably! Hi! Hey, listen, they have the best ale in
this place. I mean, it's like, bubbly, and-- "
G: "No, we've got to-- "
Jox: "-- all kind of-- "
Ath's Warrior [War]: "Joxer, I presume."
Jox: "Yeah-- yeah, that's, uh, spelled with an `x' [Clears
throat]-- the `x' is for, uh-- `extra super sexy."
G: "Joxer-- these people-- ."
Jox [Interrupts]: "Not now." [Clears throat]
Ath's War: "Athena thanks you for being Xena and Gabrielle's
most high-profile acquaintance."
Jox: "Oh, well, uh-- I'm very high-profile all around town--
`Mr. Get-around town,' they call me, actually-- in certain
circles. Come on, girls."
G: "Let him go."
[Fight]
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[ACT III]
Ath: "So-- looks Xena couldn't leave death in your hands,
either."
G: "Look-- the baby can't do anything-- Ah-ah-h! Ow-w-w."
Hades: "Where-- is my sister?"
Ath: "Hades-- Gabrielle is no use to us dead. You can't kill
the child until Celesta's free-- and given our time constraint--
diplomacy is the best way of accomplishing that. But then
again-- where is she?"
Jox: "Don't tell her anything, Gabrielle-- anything Goldy-pants
here can dish out, I can take. OK, tell her. Tell her."
G: "She's headed to the ocean."
Jox: "Mm-hmm."
Ath: "Details to follow, I'm sure."
G: "Joxer!"
Jox: "Gaby?"
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X: "Athena-- we were just going on a joy ride to celebrate being
immortal. Oh, Celesta-- well-- it's too late for her, I'm
afraid."
Ath: "I hope that's not true, Xena-- for Gabrielle's sake."
X: "What have you done with her?"
G: "Xena-- I'm sorry, I had no choice."
Ath: "It's very simple, Xena-- Gabrielle-- for Celesta."
G: "Let the candle burn, Xena."
Ath: "Do that, Xena-- and your little girl will still be
hunted-- for eternity. She may never know death, but I promise
you-- she will never know peace."
X: "All right."
G: "No, Xena."
X: "Gabrielle, come on. It's all right."
G [Whispers]: "All right."
Ath: "I'll be needing you, Celesta."
Cel: "My presence is required elsewhere, Athena."
Ares: "Come on-- give us a head start. I don't think that's too
much to ask, do you, Sis?"
Ath: "I think it is. You know what to do. Let them clear the
forest, first-- then drive them to us."
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Jox: "The ocean-- Xena's headed towards the ocean."
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X: "Yah! What?!"
Ares: "It's time to 'fess up, Xena. They're relentless.
They're gonna keep coming and coming, and I think you know it.
So what you need is you need me, and you need me now. I'm the
only one that can made this go away."
X: "Yah! Why are you always asking for something you are
_never_ going to get?! Get off! Yah!"
Ares: "Oh, gee-- I guess this is my exit."
X: "Yah! All right, Gabrielle-- we're on!"
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Girl: "What happened, Daddy?"
O Jox: "Uh-h-h-h-h-- well, it's the end of the scroll, Pumpkin,
but it's not the end of the story."
Boy: "How do you know?"
Jox: "'Cause I was there."
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X: "Come on! Gabrielle! Whoa! Gabrielle! Ah-h-h-h!"
G: "Uh!"
Ath: "It ends now."
X: "Gabrielle-- Gabrielle."
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X: "Gabrielle? Eve? Eve?! Eve? [Whispers] Eve. [Normal
Voice] Eve? Oh-- oh. Oh!"
Ath: "The prophecy has been shattered."
X: "No-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o!"
Jox: "Oh, no."
X: "Gabrielle-- Gabrielle? Oh-- Gabrielle?" [Cries]
Jox: "Oh, gods."
[Cries]
X: "Each to his own. You to yours-- and me to mine!
Ah-h-h-h-h!"
Ares: "No, Xena-- don't."
X: "Ares-- you can't stop me this time."
Ares: "No."
X: "It's over. It's over. Join your family. Tell them it's a
package deal. They get me, too."
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[ACT IV]
Oct's Voice: "Unbelievable. Where are they?"
Oct: "Joxer-- good to see you, again. Where's Xenar [sic] and
Gabrielle?"
Jox: "Octavius-- they're gone. I saw the whole thing but I was
too far away. I coudn't help them."
Oct: "Joxer-- they're not dead."
Jox [Whispers]: "What? [Normal Voice] What?! Eve-- it can't
be. Eve?"
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Boy: "Dad-- how was Eve alive?"
O Jox: "OK, OK. Remember back. What did the fates tell Xena?"
Girl: "That she had to die-- to save Eve?"
O Jox: "That's right. But remember, you can't take what the
fates say literally. They said-- `Only in the essence-- '"
[[[[[[Clo [Interrupts]: "Only in the essence of death, will the
child find salvation, and the twilight be set in motion."]]]]]]
O Jox: "`The essence of death.'"
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Oct: "The tears, Joxer-- did you see her drink the tears?"
Jox: "She drank poison, Octavius."
Oct [and O Jox's Voice]: "But it wasn't poison."
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O Jox's Voice [As Narrator]: "You see, Xena never intended to
kill death at all. It was Celesta's tears she really needed--
the essence-- of death-- the only thing, Xena realized, that
could simulate the appearance of their deaths to the gods-- "
[[[[[[X: "Eve?"]]]]]]
O Jox's Voice [As Narrator]: "-- but only after convincing the
gods-- that Eve had also been killed."
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Boy: "But-- Eve was in-- "
O Jox: "Eve-- was in-- the wagon."
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Jox: "Eve was in that cart."
Oct: "No, Joxer."
[[[[[[G: "You know, she's right about one thing, Xena-- the gods
will stop at nothing. Holding Celesta prevents them from killing
anyone, but they'll inflict pain-- suffering."]]]]]]
O Jox's Voice [As Narrator]: "Eve was safe. The tears were
collected. Next-- release Celesta without it looking suspicious.
Gabrielle got captured-- on purpose. Trying to rescue me made
her capture look like it was unplanned."
[[[[[[Ath: "Where is she?" Jox: "OK, tell her! Tell
her!"]]]]]]
O Jox's Voice [As Narrator]: "Gabrielle revealed Xena's
location."
[[[[[[G: "She's headed to the ocean." Ath: "Details to follow,
I'm sure."]]]]]]
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O Jox: "The rest of the plan played out."
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O Jox's Voice [As Narrator]: "The gods assumed-- Xena-- "
[[[[[[X: "Yah!"]]]]]]
O Jox's Voice [As Narrator]: "-- and her child-- were
inseparable."
[[[[[[X: "Gabrielle!"]]]]]]
O Jox's Voice [As Narrator]: "My guess-- my hope-- was that
Gabrielle drank the tears first. From that point, all they had
to do was put on a convincing show."
[[[[[[X: [Yells]]]]]]]
O Jox's Voice: "To the gods, Gabrielle was killed in the crash."
[[[[[[X: "Eve?"]]]]]]
O Jox's Voice [As Narrator]: "Eve was dead-- consumed in the
burning wreckage."
[[[[[[X: "No-o-o-o-o!"]]]]]]
O Jox's Voice [As Narrator]: "And even if they weren't
completely convinced-- what better way to solve that problem than
by Xena-- taking her own life?"
[[[[[[X: "Tell them it's a package deal. They get me,
too."]]]]]]
O Jox's Voice [As Narrator]: "The effect of the tears would soon
wear off, with Xena, Eve, and Gabrielle presumed dead by all of
Olympus-- the perfect cover-- the perfect advantage. But one
thing happened-- they never could have predicted."
[[[[[[Jox: "Ares took them away-- just before you got here."
Oct: "Oh, no."]]]]]]
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Ares: "You're with her now. I handled you-- all wrong. I know
that. She knew what you needed-- unconditional-- and unselfish
love-- and I couldn't give that to you. But I appreciated you in
ways she never could-- your rage-- your violence-- your beauty.
When you sacrificed yourself for others, you were hers-- but when
you kicked ass-- you were mine. I love you, Xena."
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