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"Livia"  Episode 110/520



Ares:  "Congratulations, Livia."

Livia [Liv]:  "I've had tougher games of tag."

Ares:  "I wasn't talking about the battle.  Oh-- the battle's
good.  No, I was talking about you being named the emperor's
official successor."

Liv:  "Then our plans are on target."

Ares:  "And soon-- you will be the most powerful woman-- this
empire has ever known."

Liv:  "Then no one can stop us from exterminating the followers
of Eli-- as traitors to Rome-- and the gods she honors."


X [Moans]:  "Ga-Gabri-- ."

G:  "Uh-h-h-h-h-h.  [Whispers]  Xena [Normal Voice]-- where are

X:  "The baby-- where's Eve?"

G:  "Octavius was-- supposed to bring her to us."

X:  "Som'in's gone wrong.  We've got to get outta here and find
them."  [Yells]


X:  "Gabrielle, I don't recognize this place."

Woman:  "'R' you ladies lost?"

X:  "Well, that depends.  Where are we?"

Woman:  "At the foot of Mt. Etna."

G:  "Mt. Etna?  How did we _get_ here?"

X:  "Ares.  Ares?!  Come out!  I know you're here, someplace."

Woman:  "Beg pardon, but, uh-- Ares hasn't been seen in these
parts since the legend'ry [sic] Xena died about, ooh, 25 years

X:  "25 years."



G:  "Are you saying that we've been out-- I mean, that-- that
Xena has been dead, for 25 years?"

X:  "We gotta get to Rome?"

G:  "Why Rome?"

X:  "Because that's where Octavius was headed.  He'll know where
I can find Eve.  You!  Do you know anything about a Roman big
shot named Octavius?  He's probably a-a general, or a commander."

Woman:  "Only commander I know of is Livia-- the emperor's

X [Whispers]:  "No."

Woman:  "Excuse my language-- but when Augustus lets her
slaughter harmless people, like the followers of Eli, I just lose
my-- "

G:  "Eli?  Do people still follow his teachings?"

Woman:  "You're not from 'round here, are you?"

G:  "Thank you."


Meg's Voice:  "I really recommend the beans."

Meg:  [Farts]

Customer:  "Oh!"

Meg:  "Pardon me."

X:  "Meg-- it's Meg."

G:  "No, Xena you were identical."

Meg:  "Here, gimme that.  I'll getcha a fresh one."

G:  "If I were you, I would lay off the starches."

Meg's Voice [Farts]:  "Oh, pardon me again."

Meg [Sighs]:  "You know what?  Shorty, you kinda look like her.
Only Gabrielle wasn't so butch."

Joxer [Jox]:  "Meg!  Go on, shake your moneymaker, will ya?  We
got bardburgers burnin' back there."

Meg:  "Aw, shut up."

Jox:  "You hush up!"
Meg:  "No, you hush up!"

Jox: "Oh, yeah?!  You hush up first!"

Meg:  "I gave you the best chow-- "

G [Interrupts]:  "Joxer?"

Jox:  "What?!"

G:  "Is that you?"

Jox [Whispers]:  "Gabrielle-- Xena-- "

X:  "Joxer."


Jox:  "What're you gonna do now?"

X:  "All I know is, I've got to find my baby."

Jox:  "You know, I looked for you for years.  I only quit after--
after old Argo died."

X:  "Argo-- there'll never be another like her."

Jox:  "Come with me, girls."


Jox's Voice:  "Xena-- meet Argo-- the second."

G:  "Is that really Argo's daughter?"

Jox:  "Yeah.  Only thing is-- I never let anyone ride her."

G:  "Xena?"

X:  "Let's see what you can do.  Joxer, she's  beautiful."

Virgil [Vir] [Sighs]:  "Hey, Dad!  Can you come here 'n' take a
look at this?!"

Jox:  "Hey boy-- come here.  Huh-- I want you to meet somebody.
See?  I want you to meet-- Xena-- and Gabrielle.  This-- is

Vir [Sighs]:  "It's a privilege to finally meet you."

Jox:  "See?  Apple didn't fall far from the tree."  [Chuckles]

X:  "You have a son."

Jox:  "Yeah."

X:  "That's great."

Jox:  "Hey.  Uh, you know that, uh-- Roman friend of yours, uh--
he, uh-- he swore you two were alive, uh-- after I saw you dead.

X:  "Roman fr-- you mean Ocatavius?"

Jox:  "Yeah."

X:  "Did he have Eve with him?"

Jox:  "Yeah, but, uh-- b-but he left-- after he saw Ares drag
your bodies away."

G:  "Where is he now, Joxer?"

Jox:  "Rome."

X:  "That's where we're headed."

Jox:  "W-wait-wait-wait.  Wait a minute.  You-- y-you might not,
uh-- get there because, you know-- things have changed a lot
since you were last here.  You better let, uh-- Virgil and I take

X:  "Good."

Vir's Voice:  "This Octavius isn't gonna be easy to find."

Vir:  "The emperor's holding a victory march for his champion--
Livia.  The city's packed."

Jox:  "Yeah, yeah-- see?  So, uh-- so, it's all settled.  I'll--
I'll go get my armor and, uh-- delouse my sword and, uh-- hey--
you know-- it'll be like old times again.  Get the horses ready,
in there [?].  Hey, boy, don't forget my prunes, yeah!"


X:  "The crowd's got 'em spooked.  Think you can get them to a

G:  "Yeah.  What are you gonna do?"

X:  "I'm gonna take in the victory march."

G:  "Xena, you know how degrading they are."

X:  "Yep-- and everyone who's anyone's gonna be there."


X's Voice:  "Octavius is Augustus Caesar."


X:  "Ave, Caesar."

Man's Voice:  "Rome rules the world!"

Oct:  "Xena."

X:  "Octavius.  Where's my daughter, Octavius?"

Crowd's Voices:  "Livia!  Livia!  All hail Livia!  Livia!  Livia!
Livia!  Livia!  Livia!  Livia!"

X:  "That's her?"

Oct:  "Livia-- champion of Rome."

X:  "That's Eve?"



Liv:  "Hail, Augustus-- emperor of Rome.  I render to you the
spoils of battle."

Oct:  "Your triumph and tribute pleases us, Livia.  Accept our
imperial thanks-- and the thanks of a grateful  nation."

Man's Voice:  "All hail-- !"

X:  "Now wave and close the curtain.  Do it!"

Man's Voice:  "Caesar!"

X:  "What have you done to her?"

Oct:  "Done?  You saw-- she's incredible."

X:  "She's a warrior for Rome!"

Oct:  "She's alive.  Considering all of Mt. Olympus wanted to
kill her-- wanted to crush the bringer of twilight-- what more
did you expect?"

X:  "I'll tell you what I expected-- I expected to raise her
myself!  To show her a way beyond the blood and the violence!"

Oct:  "But you weren't there!  She was sent away as a child-- and
raised in the provinces-- with every advantage.  She had the best
tutors, the best training!"

X:  "For what?  I saw the slaves.  She's a monster!"

Oct:  "She's the greatest wariror Rome's ever known-- and she's
going to be my wife.  Uh!"

X:  "No daughter of mine is going marry Rome."

Oct:  "Uh, she doesn't know she's your daughter.  I never told

X:  "Then I will!"

Oct:  "Why?  So the gods can hunt her again?  Only this time,
you-- won't fool them into thinking she's dead.  Please!  Xena--
I love her.  Think of Eve.  As my wife-- the gods will only know
her as Livia-- Rome's champion.  As your daughter, Eve-- they'll
kill her."


G:  "Can't sleep?"

X:  "I feel like there's no way home."

G:  "What do you mean?"

X:  "I gave away one child once.  And this time, I wanted to do
right by Eve.  But I woke up and my child had been ripped from my

G:  "Xena, she's alive.  There's a chance that you can still be
in her life."

X:  "It's not gonna be easy.  She has my darkness inside of her.
She has Callisto's spirit.  Those are tough odds to beat."

G:  "You did it."

X:  "I had help."

G:  "She has us.  Xena, she can change.  Like mother, like
daughter.  Go to her and talk to her.  She will see the truth."

X [Whispers]:  "OK.  [Normal Voice]  You're right-- whatever
turned Eve, we can turn her back.  Like mother, like daughter."


Man's Voice:  "One crop this season!"

Vir:  "This is my shop."

X:  "Great-- we'll meet you back here later."

G:  "Xena, are you sure you don't need help?"

Jox:  "Yeah, I-I could come with ya, you know?  I'm still Joxer
the m [Coughs]-- Joxer  the m [coughs]-- "

X:  "Thanks, anyway.  Wish me luck."

Jox:  [Coughs]

Vir:  "Fortune favors the brave."

G:  "I'll say.  You have a way with words."

Jox:  "Words, schmords-- you should see him shoe a horse.  Now,
that's something to see."

Soldier [Sold]:  "Citizens!  Your attention!  Your attention,
please!  Attention!  To commemmorate her victories-- Livia has
commissioned a new temple-- to Ares.  Your offerings-- are

A Sold:  "Cough it up, citizens!  Come on.  Pay your respects."

Another Sold:  "Money for the god's temple."

Jox:  "Blow it out your ass, Titan."

Vir:  "Let go 'a him!"

Another Sold:  "It's not-- a request."

G:  "Look-- you can't force us to give money to the gods."

Sold:  "You're one of those-- Eli believers."

G:  "I believe that you have a right to choose whatever faith you
want.  Now, let him go."

Another Sold:  "Or you'll do what?"


Vir:  "We're not lookin' for trouble."

Sold:  "Too bad-- you already found it.  Get 'em!"

A Sold's Voice:  "The woman's mine!"

Voice of a Sold:  "Get them!"

Jox:  "Now you'll taste the steel of Joxer the mighty!  Yeh!

Sold:  "Stop!  Or the old man gets it!"

Solds' Voices:  "Let's go, tough guy!"  "Come on!"


Ares:  "Whoo!  You are _worse_ than a wasp!"

Liv:  "Ha-- death has no sting for gods, remember?  Yah!

Ares:  "Hah!  Give up?"

Liv:  "I'll give you somethin'."



X:  "If you were mortal-- I'd cut out your heart."

Ares:  "Xena."

X:  "Kiss _this_."

Ares:  "Ooh."

Liv:  "Charming.  Move-- and I'll kill you."

Ares:  "Take it easy, Livia.  It's not how it looks."

Liv:  "Then how _is_ it?"

Ares:  "For 25 years, I thought Xena was dead.  And now she shows
up, not one day older.  I had to kiss her-- make sure she was
real-- not an impostor."

Liv:  "You're telling me that you had to kiss her to I.D. her?"

Ares:  "Think about it.  If Xena is still alive-- chances are
that Eve is, too.  And if she is-- then I'm the dead man."

Liv:  "Because Eve is the bringer of twilight."

X:  "Eve is dead, and you know it."

Liv:  "Who asked you?"

Ares:  "Livia, don't."


Ares:  "No, let her go.  She'll be back.  And if Eve is alive--
she'll lead us right to her."


Jox:  "It's all my fault.  If I hadn't opened my big mouth, we
wouldn't be in this mess.  Gabrielle's furious with me."

Vir:  "Are you kidding?  After all the times you helped her and
Xena?  I mean-- saving 'em from the-- the bacchae-- and dryads--
and not to mention Callisto all those times."

Jox:  "Listen, now-- why don't we not mention any of that to her.
I mean, I-- I don't want her to feel that-- she owes me-- you

G:  "Nobody knows what's going on.  In fact, nobody deserves to
be here.  I don't get it."

Vir:  "I do.  They're followers of Eli."

G's Voice:  "That's Eve, isn't it?"

Vir:  "Better known as Livia."

Liv's Voice:  "All right, listen up."

Liv:  "You pick a champion to fight me in the arena.  To keep it
fair-- I'll provide the weapons and armor.  If he wins-- you go
free.  I win, and you die."

G:  "That is not salvation.  That's slaughter.  You're above

Liv:  "How would _you_ know?"

G:  "Ask _yourself_ that question."

Liv:  "You sheep would do well to choose him as your champion.
Yeah-- you're the one."


X:  "Hello, Octavius."

Oct:  "I see the years haven't robbed you of your-- stealth."

X:  "No, just my child.  But don't worry-- I'm not gonna kill
ya-- not today.  I believe that you truly do care for my
daughter.  I'm going to save her.  Are you in or out?"

Oct:  "Save her from what?  Marrying me?  Xenar [sic], I love
her-- and what's more, Livia loves me."

X:  "Fool.  She doesn't love you.  She loves the god of war."

Oct:  "Ares-- what's he got to do with this?"

X:  "Everything-- who do you think tapped into her dark side?  He
seduced her with promises of absolute power."

Oct:  "That's a lie.  Livia's hard-- but she's honorable."

X:  "Ares is going to be at the bacchanalia tonight.  So am I."

Oct:  "Livia has posted guards with orders to stop you on sight."

X:  "I'll deal with that.  When I catch up with Ares-- I'm going
to give you a signal.  Be watching-- and find a way to get Eve
close enough to overhear us."

Oct:  "But why?"

X:  "Because Ares has her standing on the edge of an abyss.  She
can't even see it.  So you be there.  You be watching when I give
the word."


Oct:  "Livia, I'd like a word with you."

Ares:  "Hit me."

X:  "Don't tempt me."

Ares:  "I was kinda hopin' you'd be back.  I gotta know what
happened.  I thought you were dead."

X:  "It's a nasty rumor."

Ares:  "No-- no, see, I mourned you.  For years, I mourned you."

X:  "Yes, you looked positively grief-stricken when I saw you
today at the arena."

Ares:  "What?  That rough-and-tumble with Livia?  You're not

X:  "Of a Roman wannabe?  Hardly."

Ares:  "Well, you're right-- she's not you.  Because if I
thought, for one moment-- that you being here meant we had a
second chance-- "

X:  "Yes?"

Ares:  "-- I'd drop her like a nasty habit."

Oct:  "You and Ares?  I'd sooner see the empire destroyed than
leave it to you."



X:  "Ares."

Ares:  "Still pickin' up on me after all these years.  I'm
flattered.  But you're not the only one with insight.  I picked
up on som'in', too.  Wanna hear?"

X:  "No."

Ares:  "Livia-- or should I say, Eve?"

X:  "I don't know what you're talking about."

Ares:  "Yeah, you do.  Both times I've seen you it's been because
Livia's been there-- the arena, the bacchanalia-- bet you're
gonna try and see her now, right?  Ri-i-ight.  See?  I figured
out, whatever you did to cheat death, I must've slowed up by
putting you and Gabrielle on ice-- but not Eve.  And so for 25
years, she kept growing-- into Livia-- champion of Rome."

X:  "Keep out of my way."

Ares:  "The moment it hit me, I knew.  I don't know why I didn't
see it before, but I didn't-- I swear."

X:  "And that's supposed to make it OK?"

Ares:  "No-- it's supposed to make you see that it wasn't

X:  "It doesn't get more personal than when you corrupt my
daughter the way you did me."

Ares:  "See?  That is just my point.  It's not the same.
Nobody's the same as you, Xena, not for me."

X:  "Then let me take her away.  Ares, the other gods don't need
to know."

Ares:  "It's not my call-- but the offer-- is what it's always
been-- you and me together-- a child-- and I take Livia's secret
with me to the grave.  Otherwise-- "

X:  "You'd condemn to death a woman you claim to love?"

Ares:  "No-- but I'd condemn her daughter."


G:  "What are you doing?"

Vir:  "Um-- that?  It's-- nothing."

G:  "Are you writing?"

Vir:  "Yes.  Um-- I write-- or-- at least I try, but-- I'm
nowhere near as good as you."

G:  "You're a bard."

Vir:  "I-I write poems-- uh-- epic-- poems."

G:  "I had no idea.  Why didn't you say so?"

Vir:  "'Cause Dad doesn't like it.  I think he wishes I was more
like him-- you know-- a real hero instead of writing about one?"

Jox:  "Virgil-- you _are_ a hero.  You were willing to risk your
life fo fight Livia-- and try and save all our lives."

Vir:  "Well, that's nothing compared to the stories about what
_you've_ done."

Jox:  "Virgil-- all the stories I-- told you about me being a
hero are, uh-- uh"

G:  "They're inspiring."

Vir:  "I'll say.  I mean, that's why I write 'em down-- so
everyone who reads 'em might try to find the courage to be a
hero, too-- and _I_ did."

G:  "Runs in the family."


X:  "I didn't come here to fight.  I came to talk."

Liv:  "About what?  Ares?  Well, you can have him-- if you live
long enough.  Ha-ha."

X:  "It's not about Ares.  I want to talk about _you_."

Liv:  "Me?  You don't know the first thing about me!"

X:  "But I do.  I know your first laugh-- your first tears.  I
know your first breath.  I'm your mother.  You're my daughter.
Your name is Eve."

Liv:  "Well, Ares was right about one thing-- you're incredible."

X:  "It's an incredible story-- but the bottom line is, Ares now
_knows_ I'm your mother.  You're in grave danger."

Liv:  "You're insane!  Why would I believe you?!"

X:  "You _are_ my daughter.  When the other gods find out, you're
g-- "

Liv:  "Shut up!  You-- are _not_ my mother.  Rome-- is my mother.
You're the one I want to fight to the death-- tomorrow-- in the
arena-- just you and me."



Man's Voice:  "Livia!  It's Livia!"

Woman's Voice:  "Kill her-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r!"

Man's Voice:  "Livia rules!"

Woman's Voice:  "Livia-a-a-a-a-a-a-a!"

Men's Voices:  "-- champion!"  "To us be victorious!"

Liv:  "Livia-- commander of the legions of Rome is here as your
champion.  Announce the match.  Would you deny the people their
sport?  Announce the match!"

Oct:  "The first match will be fought by Livia-- defender of
Rome-- "

Men's Voices:  "Yeah!"

Oct:  "-- against the champion of the followers of Eli-- Xena."


Man's Voice:  "Kill her!"

Women's Voices:  "Execute the traitor!"  "Go, Livia!"

Men's Voices:  "Destroy Xena!"  "Kill Xena!"

Woman's Voice:  "Glory to Livia!"

Men's Voices:  "You can do it!"  "Livia!"

Woman's Voice:  "Down with Xena!"

Man's Voice:  "Today you die, Xena!"

X:  "We don't have to do this."

Liv:  "I know."

Man's Voice:  "Make her suffer!"

Oct:  "Begin."

Liv:  "Yah-h-h-h-h!"


Woman's Voice:  "Rip her to pieces!"

X:  "Eve, I know you're angry!"

Man's Voice:  "Come on, Xena!"

X:  "Give us time."

Liv:  "Our time ran out 25 years ago."

Woman's Voice:  "Cut her head off!"

Man's Voice:  "Give her-- !"

Woman's Voice:  "Xena!"

X:  "I will never give up on you Eve-- never!"

Liv:  "I'm Livia!"

Man's Voice:  "Xena!"

Woman's Voice:  "Kill her!"

Man's Voice:  "Finish her!"

X:  "I'm not going to kill you, Eve.  You're my daughter--
whether you know it or not.  I love you."

Liv:  "Then let-- me-- die."

Man's Voice:  "Kill her!"

Woman's Voice:  "Let her die!"

Liv:  [Coughs]

Man's Voice:  "Murder her!"

Vir:  "Our champion chooses mercy!"

G:  "Life for us all!"

G's Voice:  "Life!"

G:  "Life for us all!"

Man's Voice:  "Life!"  

Woman's Voice:  "Let her live!"

Man's Voice:  "Show mercy!"

Liv:  "Uh!  I'll make you wish I'd never been born."

X:  "No, Eve."

Man's Voice:  "Thank you, Xena!  Thank you, Xena!"

X:  "Eve?"

Man's Voice:  "Bless you, Xena!"

Woman's Voice:  "Thank you, Xena!"

X:  "Eve!  Eve!  Eve.  We've gotta go after her, Gabrielle.
She'll do something terrible.  We've gotta save her from
herself-- and the gods."


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