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NEWS GOSSIP RUMORS
#15

By Laura Sue Dean
February 25, 1998


NEWS!
MERCHANDISE!
XWP SIGHTINGS!
CONVENTIONS!
WEBSITES!
GOSSIP!
RUMORS!
GABRIELLE 3: HELL SEASON
THE RIFT-O-METER
BORING RATINGS STUFF
LETTERS TO LAURA SUE
LAURA SUE NEEDS YOU!




WELL EVERYBODY! I'M BACK! Yes, the hustle and bustle of fast-lane travel took its toll, but I wouldn't have traded places with anyone for the experience! (For those who don't know, I took a sabbatical to travel with Kate Winslet on the last leg of her TITANIC press tour. She's SO lovely! (oh man, is she ever LOVELY!) And thanks for the cards and letters from those of you who were worried about my absence...) Also thanks to those of you who came to the WHOOSH! table at the Burbank Con to see me. I truly enjoyed meeting each and every one of you. (Bret said some of you were early-risers ... sorry I missed you!) I look forward to meeting everybody at the next one. Well? What's up with y'all!? I've been so busy with Ms. Winslet and her publicity machine, I've missed the last few episodes. Seen any good ones lately?

ANYWAY, I am sooo behind in all I have to tell you, (and I have sooo much to tell you), that my editor told me I have to do it over a couple of issues. SO... look forward to seeing NGR #16 next Wednesday! As punishment for shirking my WHOOSH duties being Kate's whipping grrrl for the past month, (hey, what can I say...it hurts so GOOD!) my editor told me I have to go on a weekly schedule for the next couple of issues. I am fanning myself already. I may need to go off on another month junket after I am done with my penance. Editor's can be so...medieval at times.



NEWS!


PUT ANOTHER CANDLE ON HER BIRTHDAY CAKE. Renee O'Connor celebrated her 27th year on February 15, 1998. At her request, GABSclan members celebrated by "spreading the ROC word that she wants us to be good to each other and help those who need help the most." The GABRIELLE mailing lists asked that other ROC/GAB fans do the same -- and when finished, write ROCMailer to let them know what good will you've spread!

ON A RELATED NOTE, WHEN ASKED FOR A FAVORITE CHARITY to send donations to (in her name), ROC stated "Let the donations be given in their own community so they can see the benefit of their donation in person." Sounds like there's a lot of Gabrielle in ROC...or is it the other way around?

OH NO XENOS DON'T GO XENOS DON'T GO OH NO! Ladies and Gentlemen, February 6, 1998 looked like a VERY sad day for Xenite Fandom. On that date, the most AWESOME, complete FAN FIC Directory, XENOS' XENAFICTION SITE, closed its doors. The on-line world was aflutter and chaos reigned, until Bardeyes and Xenabat were given the "Xena: Warrior Princess: Fan Fiction Index" franchise! Xenos blessed it and everything! Visit by clicking HERE!.

LET'S GO SHOPPING!! Brad Carpenter played salesman when the Home Shopping Network featured an hour of Xena & Hercules merchandise Tuesday January 27, 1998. Items included 3 T-shirts (the sepia Xena, the 3 Gabrielle's and a Herc), Limited edition plaques signed by Lucy, Renee and Kevin Sorbo (Lucy sold out almost immediately), Xena motion cards, Hercules Sword of Veracity, limited edition Xena pewter figures, and baseball caps. The show also featured footage from the annual Hercules & Xena convention held recently in California featuring an appearance by Xena star Lucy Lawless...also featured in Burbank was that slide of Brad and another HUNK carrying Lucy onstage in their arms on the Leno show.... Say, maybe autographed pics of THAT slide will be available for purchase soon on a similar "Shop at Home" show for the GAY ENTERTAINMENT TELEVISION, Brad's new employer. Congrats, Brad! NGR wishes you the best of luck and much success with your new endeavor.



MERCHANDISE


MOST POPULAR VIDEOS. Weekly charts for the nation's most popular videos as they appeared in the Jan. 31, 1998 issue of Billboard magazine. And you doubted how obsessive we are about XENA information! Used with permission:

VIDEO SALES
Copyright 1998, Billboard Publications Inc.

1.''Men In Black,'' (Columbia TriStar)

The title, at least, inspired cousin Herc's "Men in Pink" which cranked up its thespian powers by uniting Autolycus and Salmoneus for the first time. The show was based upon the movie "Some like it Hot" and it was hot in places. Autolycus' temperature displacement with Cupcake will be further explored in the upcoming episode, "My Fair Cupcake" (holy nuances of Pygmalion, Batman). (LSD note: WHY isn't Salmoneus slated for the sequel to MIP?...inquiring minds would very much like to know!) BTW, the actress who played Cupcake, Lacey Kohl, also appeared in Broadway's production of "Grease". Laura Sue does not like to foster conspiracy theories but what the hey, we're all friends here! Yes, Laura Sue smells a conspiracy between the Broadway "Grease" production and RenPic. The obvious tie is Lucy Lawless playing Rizzo for the month of September and October 1997, but does it stop here? NO WAY! Now a "Sandy" appearing in HERC, and the director of "Grease" being the choreographer of XENA'S "The Bitter Suite"? When will the conspiracy STOP?

2.''Scream,'' (Dimension)

Yes! "Scream". That's what Laura Sue did after watching that "drop and drag" of the Gabster in the beginning of "The Bitter Suite", and THEN...what's with Gab getting her stuffing beaten out by the juvenile delinquent in "Forgiven"? Can't they make a rule that the only person to get beaten up and dragged around be Xena or, better yet -- Joxer?

3.''My Best Friend's Wedding,'' (Columbia TriStar)

(LSD NOTE: Little do most people know this was actually based upon XWP's "Return of Callisto")

4.''George of the Jungle,'' (Disney)

Ladies and Gentlemen: Laura Sue Dean had a dream, nay nightmare this week, about Joxer becoming George of the Jungle... Gabrielle was his woman (ICK!), and all Xena wanted to do was *fish!* All I can say is, NO MORE BAD CAVIAR! These post-production parties are going to be the end of Laura Sue! The more LSD thinks about it, maybe she could work up a pitch for the idea and present it to "Sinbad" or something?

5.''The Lost World: Jurassic Park,'' (Universal)

6.''Hanson: Tulsa, Tokyo and the Middle of Nowhere,'' (PolyGram)

Hanson! Okay...okay... they are bizarre -- but they remind me of home. (ummmm, that would be Topeka, KS to you unaware-types!) You can get the girl out of the Midwest but never the Midwest out of girl! I have tried! Oh, how I have tried!

7.''Rage Against the Machine,'' (Epic)

8.''Air Bud,'' (Disney)

Sniff... okay... a moment of silence please for the STAR of Air Bud, who passed away this month...

9.''Spice Girls: One Hour of Girl Power,'' (Warner)

No no no no no.....I *won't* go there! Lucky you!

10.''Liar Liar,'' (Universal)

11.''Star Trek: First Contact,'' (Paramount)

12.''Star Wars Trilogy - Special Edition,'' (Fox)

13.''Hercules & Xena: The Battle From Mt. Olympus,'' (Universal)

Even with the block chins and the Gabbybird, after the twentieth viewing, the video doesn't seem that bad...(yeah, right!)

14.''Sling Blade,'' (Miramax)

15.''Nine Inch Nails: Closure,'' (Interscope)

16.''Batman & Robin,'' (Warner)

Some people have had the audacity to call Xena and Gabrielle a "female Batman and Robin." Now THAT is so totally NOT! Everyone who knows anything about Xena and Gabrielle KNOWS that they are a female Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid! And be sure to check out the girls in some Redford/Newman type action in "King Con" this week. Talk about the spirit of Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid. The creators of XWP are so movie homage crazy this season that they are mixing metaphors along with Redford/Newman movies. It's enough to make my head spin! I have the strangest urge to make a "Wedding Singer" joke right now.

17.''The Land Before Time V: The Mysterious Island,'' (Universal Studios)

18.''Fleetwood Mac: The Dance'' (Warner Bros.)(Gold)

19.''West Side Story,'' (MGM/UA)

20.''Beauty and the Beast: The Enchanted Christmas,'' (Disney)

VIDEO RENTALS
VidTrac Results for Home Video Rental Activity for the Week Ended Feb. 8, 1998
FAMILY VIDEO Category:

1. "Air Bud" (may he Rest In Peace, sniff!)

2. "Land Before Time V: Mysterious Island"

3. "Hercules & Xena: Battle of Mt. Olympus"

4 "Belle's Magical World"

5. "Cats Don't Dance"

(Hey, but lucky for us that Bacchae do!)

COMIX NEWS. The conclusion (Thank GAWD. Let's put Xena back into her own comix!) to the three part "Joxer Warrior Prince" Xena Comic Bookstory (US$2.95 ) is now out. As usual, the comic comes with either an Art or Photocover ; however, this time you can just buy the Photo cover if you want, because the Terese Nielsen Artwork (from the Art cover ) has been placed in the center of both versions of the comic. Also, Herc & Iolaus make a 'guest' appearance in this issue, and Joxer gets his 'come-up-ins'. (Perhaps we can get TARA back to help out in this arena? OUCH!)

TOPPS OFFICIAL XENA MAGAZINE # 2 ( US$4.95 ) is also now available. You can get it either with a Xena cover, or a Callisto cover. As with the first issue, the pictures, the interviews, the insights & the artwork, are all _to die for_. I picked mine up at my local Von's Grocery Store. They are all so *progressive* in Los Angeles! I won't spoil anything for you, but here are some of this issue's features:

      1) Season #3 article entitled, "Xena's Destiny : Warrior at the Crossroads" includes update interviews with Lucy & Renee' .
      2) Hudson Leick Interview entitled, "Here Comes Trouble" ( Wow ! Includes photos of "pin-cushion" Callisto (MATERNAL INSTINCTS), and a Bettie Page-type cheese cake photo of Hudson from her modeling days ).
      3) An article on how Flat Earth fx-wizards put together the 'Gabrielle captured by the Fire Demon' effects from "The Deliverer".
      4) Gorgeous panoramic painting by Dave DeVries of Xena fighting Callisto, called "Clash of the Titans".
      5) Season #2 Episode Guide.
      6) A Joe Nazzaro short article on Xena's reluctant allies, including Salmoneus, Autolycus, Petracles, & Meleager the Mighty.
      7) Speaking of "The Mighty", there is also an interview with Ted Raimi by Joe Nazzaro (note that this appears to be a different Nazarro interview of TR than he gave in STARLOG magazine, but some of the same points are covered....only so many bulbs in the box?).
      8) There is a Xena / Callisto Comic entitled "Callisto's Final Triumph ".
      9) There is a photo-saga of Callisto as told by Gabrielle & Xena.
      10) There is an article of how the Xena VR on-line game was developed.
      11) And last, but certainly *not* least, (heavy sigh) there is a giant Gabrielle Poster inside. Well, not a giant GABRIELLE, actually -- a nice-sized poster of that Goddess of Gab...that wind beneath Xena's wings...that GORGEOUS gal we love -- the one that speaks softly and carries a great big stick!



XWP SIGHTINGS


OKAY. LAURA SUE GOT BORED with this feature, but on the way to Stanley's office today I saw a busboard for a local college that *confirms* that XWP has completely infiltrated our brains and forever changed modern culture. The picture shows a smiling young man: mortar board on head, fist up in triumph, with a newly gotten diploma in hand. Caption: "Somehow, missing 114 episodes of XENA: WARRIOR PRINCESS doesn't seem all that bad now!" Now, don't ask me what alternative universe this young man is missing these episodes in (there have only been 61 episodes of XWP aired yet) -- it's the thought that counts!



CONVENTIONS


THE 2ND ANNUAL NEW YORK CITY XENAFEST has been set for April 18, 1998 in New York City's Skyline Hotel. Write to Mistopholees or call her at 1-516-488-0392 / 1-718-260-3127, or visit the Official NYC XenaFest 2 Page.

THE 2ND ANNUAL PACIFIC NORTH WEST XENAFEST has been set for May 30, 1998 in Renton (near Seattle), Washington. Write to Julie Ruffell or visit HERE for more information.

UPCOMING CONVENTIONS INCLUDE:
Raimi in Boston (03/22/98) Creation
NYC XenaFest (04/18/98) Fan
TBA in Phoenix (05/31/98) Creation
NWP XenaFest (05/30/98) Fan
Trebor/Sears in Las Vegas (06/14-18/98) Multimedia Con
TBA in Minneapolis (08/08/98) Creation
TBA in Cherry Hill, NJ (08/29-30/98) Creation
TBA in Atlanta (09/03-06/98) DragonCon
TBA in San Francisco (10/18/98) Creation
TBA in Santa Monica (01/99) Creation

IF YOU ARE ORGANIZING A FAN CONVENTION, FAN FEST, OR WHATEVER, drop Laura Sue a line and I will shamelessly promote the heck out of it, especially if you give me a comp ticket to the event!



WEBSITES!


FOR THOSE OF YOU THAT DO NOT own your very own deck of Tarot, atx'r erin has completed it for you. Click here and check out her site for an explanation of the characters used in the XENA episode, THE BITTER SUITE. Thanks, Erin!



GOSSIP!


NORMA RAE, WHERE ARE YOU?! Laura Sue was as GIDDY as an ingenue on Oscar night as she checked the convention program supplied in her Towncar on the ride in from the airport. FlatEarth was scheduled to make a presentation at the 2nd Annual Burbank HerK/Xena Convention...But they were a no-show...wha happened???? This was a huge disappointment, and as for reasons why they were absent, well LSD's mind cannot fathom...MEGA-bad hair days all-around? Perhaps they were still toiling away on THE BITTER SUITE post-production? -- (LSD Unsolicited opinion: THE BITTER SUITE is such a mind-blowing production, from start to finish. It must have been a *terror* to pull off, but pull it off they all did, with flair! -- TPTB, the crew, actors, the COSTUMERS, and posties... It will be a MAJOR DRAG if this valiant effort doesn't receive an emmy nod.)

SPEAKING OF EMMYS. Check the February 6 edition of Daily Variety for the Advertisement for THE BITTER SUITE. Laura Sue will get her copy scanned and you'll be able to see what it looked like in an upcoming edition of NGR.

****NEWS FLASH!!!**** BLACK FRIDAY FOR FLAT EARTH. First, FlatEarth misses the Burbank Con, and now LSD hears that "a lot" of the FlatEarth Staff were "laid off or quit" on Friday February 6, 1998 -- the same week THE BITTER SUITE aired. BitterSweet coincidence? You be the judge! (and we don't mean JUDY!)



RUMORS!


DON'T BELIEVE EVERYTHING YOU READ: Several Brit readers wrote to Laura Sue in a panic -- seems some SciFi magazine over the pond ran an ad with a "pay-per-listen" Teletext number with a teaser line stating "Xena's Sidekick was leaving the show!" I went straight to the source -- ROC's Fan Club and this is what they had to say about that:

"Hi LSD, We have received confirmation that the Teletext message was about Hudson. This is the stuff rumors are made from!"
--Rocweb

UPDATE ON CALLISTO'S DEMISE. Laura Sue snipped this from the gossip rags for your speculating pleasure...

"DAILY DISH. As devotees of Xena: Warrior Princess know, Callisto, Xena's wacky nemesis, is determined to be immortal. But if reports from the West Coast prove true, her life span on the show is about to be shortened. According to sources, actress Hudson Leick, who plays the wildly popular Callisto on the syndicated show, appeared at a recent Xena convention and told fans that her exit is imminent. In interviews, Leick has repeatedly expressed concern for her character's development and indicated plot possibilities for Callisto may have been exhausted. Xena executive producer Rob Tapert told fans that Callisto was being put to rest, according to conventioneers, but hinted that Leick might be cast in her own series. All of this was news to Leick's representative, who indicated reports of the actress's departure were premature. 'The first I've heard of it is from you guys,' Leick's rep told us. 'If I hear of anything I'll call you.' A call to the Xena publicist was not returned. "

THE NEXT DAY'S ITEM:

"A few more supporting players have weighed in about Hudson Leick's possible departure from Xena: Warrior Princess. The upshot? It appears the Leick and Xena camps have both formally adopted a wait-and-see attitude.

"'First of all, she is not a series regular on either Hercules or Xena," clarified Leick representative Jeff Goldberg. "She's a recurring player on both, and she's got two more appearances coming up on Xena. Whether or not she'll continue after that is purely up to whether or not we get material that we like and she wants to continue, and whether or not we find other opportunities that are out there for her." Xena camp spokesman Michael Wright made it clear that the only certainty is that "nothing has been decided, whether she'll be there in a reduced role or won't be there at all. Anything's possible. It may be possible that she will show up in more episodes or less or whatever or not at all, but no decision has been made."

GEE MICHAEL. *Thanks* for clearing that up for us all! (Shaaa! IX-NAY on the Oublespeak-day! Sounds like Mr. Wright has a promising career ahead of him as a Presidential Press Secretary, hmmmm?)



GABRIELLE 3: HELL SEASON


WEEEEELLLLLLL, ALL-RIGHTY THEN! Let us now take score. Gabrielle, in season 3 has: been poked (in more ways than one); gets bbq-d; lied to by her best friend/soulmate; bears a demon spawn ready to unleash destruction and devastation on all mankind; gets rejected, dragged over campfires and rock formations, then killed, TWICE by said friend/soulmate... Pretty awful, indeed! However, what really wrenched my heart was when our beloved Gabby was split in three and made to dance naked for J****r! (Have TPTB no SOUL?) Say what you will about being bound and dragged through blazing campfires.... (oh, man! What SYMBOLISM!) but I'd much rather the former than the latter!

FYI: FOR THOSE OF YOU KEEPING SCORE: The REALLY bad perm in HERCULES' ARMAGEDDON II almost won out over the *GABBY a-Go-Go, x 3* incident as a *Hell Season* standout. (The fact that it was didn't actually appear on a XENA episode worked in the bad perm's favor.) Also, Laura Sue was HIGHLY miffed when someone on-line compared Ms. O'Connor's perm in ARMAGEDDON II to MINE! No-WHHHhhhay!!! Gabrielle's perm in ARMAGEDDON II is SO much more *Laurie Brinkman.* Laura Sue is never that...frazzled!



RIFT-O-METER


AFTER MUCH SCHEDULE-SWAPPING AND POST-PRODUCTION SNAFU, it's finally over! Huzzah! Or is it? Stayed tuned...



BORING RATINGS STUFF


WHILE LAURA SUE WAS OFF TRAIPSING AROUND the world with Kate Winslet, I was hanging out in a local deli. Seems they have a new croissant breakfast sandwich...I won't describe it, suffice to say, it's not kosher. Eek. But hey, I was down in the dumps, thought Laura Sue had abandoned the troops, and that I would have to find a REAL job. But, Laura Sue is back, I am back, and let's take a look at what was happening Nielsen-wise to XWP while it was in its first re-run period of the season.

SADLY ENOUGH, VARIETY and UTV neglected to report the Nielsen's for the week that the DIRTY HALF DOZEN was repeated. Therefore, that week shall remain a mystery until Nielsen answers the thus far unanswered questions from this lowly correspondent.

THE REPEAT SEASON FOR THE THIRD SEASON started with the re-release of THE FURIES (47/301, released 11/24/97). X-FILES kept its lead (which it has kept since day one, sigh) with 6.5 (ranking 6th overall) with the episode "Ghost in the Machine". (Wasn't there a B movie by that name? I need a CAFFEINATED BEVERAGE RIGHT NOW!) At number two, XENA tied with STAR TREK: DEEP SPACE NINE with 5.1 (ranking 13th overall) for a first run episode called "Statistical Probabilities" (133/609). Poor STAR TREK, even a first run can't beat the express train called, XENA. XENA, herself, dropped 1.2 points from the first run KING OF ASSASSINS (54/308) the previous week. HERCULES came in as the third action hour with 4.9 (ranking 16th) for the repeat of "Beanstalks and Bad Eggs" (60/401), dropping 1.5 points from the megapopular first run AND FANCY FREE (67/408) the previous week; WALKER: TEXAS RANGER came in 4th (ranking 15th); NYPD BLUE came in 5th (ranking 23rd); EARTH FINAL: CONFLICT tied with BAYWATCH at 6th with a 3.8 (ranking 25th) (CONFLICT was a first run, "Horizon Zero" 08/108); and CONAN came in 7th with a 2.0 ("Imposter" 10/110).

THINGS LOOKED BETTER THE NEXT WEEK with everyone doing better, most likely in recovery from Thanksgiving Day. The invincible X-FILES came in at 7.1 (ranking 6th again!) with "Ice". XENA took 2nd place with 5.6 (ranking 13, again!) with the repeat of "Been There, Done That" (48/302), writer Hilary Bader's frosh episode. BEEN THERE originally earned a 5.6 in its first release. Deja vu all over again! HERK took 3rd with a repeat of "Hero's Heart" (61/402), clocking in with 5.1, .2 points better than the week before. WALKER came in 4th with 4.7 (ranking 18th); STAR TREK came in 5th with 4.6 (ranking 20th) with its first repeat of the season "Simple Investigation" from last season; NYPD BLUE came in 6th with 4.5 (ranking 21st); PENSACOLA, that show with Barbra's main squeeze, came in 7th with 3.8; and TEAM KNIGHT RIDER came in 8th with 2.6 for "Iron Maiden" (09/109). Whew! This is not a pretty job folks. I would much prefer leeching off of "Titanic" junkets.

THE NEXT WEEK, THE WEEK starting 12/08/97, was IGNORED and ABANDONED by both Variety and UTV and all the other sources I use. Bummer. So, I have no idea what the ratings were for the repeat of "Dirty Half Dozen" (49/303). If you have any information on the whereabouts for these Nielsen numbers, please write Speedy at iaxs@aol.com. And since I am talking about writing, I might as well rant a bit. I was gone for a month! A lousy month and I get back from my loooong weekend at the deli and check my mailbox and NOTHING!!! NOT ONE SINGLE E-MAIL. Gosh. I may have to double up on my therapy sessions now. Sheesh.

THE NEXT WEEK AFTER THAT was the week beginning 12/15/98, but I think I shall stop here and start up again in the next issue, which BTW will not be A MONTH LATE because our editor finally showed some backbone and has finally called Laura Sue on taking advantage of all these perks she's getting for doing this column to the detriment of EVERYONE ELSE. SHE gets to be Kate Winslet's roadie and I hang out in delis begging strangers for loose change so I can get another breakfast sandwich. She gets tons of mail and I get an EMPTY BOX. Okay, I am working on my envy management, but still!!! I was one happy camper when the bosses took LSD out behind the barn for a good Gabrielle-whupping. Luckily she never proofs her own copy so I could go on for hours about how spoiled she is, how she's a prima donna, and very hard to work with. But I won't. Heck, maybe she'll be able to get me on the on the "Half Baked" junket.

SO THERE YOU HAVE IT! That was what it looked like the first three weeks into the 7 weeks of repeats between KING OF ASSASSINS and WARRIOR...PRIESTESS...TRAMP. So, until next week this is Speedy saying "You can never obsess too much about the ratings" and write me sometime, please? Just because Laura Sue is some cute starlet, doesn't mean Speedy don't need attention too.



LETTERS TO LAURA SUE


Hello Laura Sue:

I'm more than a little embarrassed to be asking a question of such a -- ahem -- prurient nature, but I thought you might not only be someone most likely to know, but also sympathetic to the asking.

After recently seeing the Xena episode THE QUEST for the first time, I was reminded of an article in WHOOSH! that I read some time ago. My vague memory is that the author of the article reported -- seemingly in all seriousness? -- that the script originally called for Xena to receive the ambrosia directly from Gabrielle's colletage (grin) rather than from Gabrielle's fingers. Perhaps the article said that the scene was initially filmed this way, even? Unfortunately, I can't find the reference or the article, after scouring back issues. Rats! I wondered if you had heard rumors or rumblings to this effect, or if I've been eating too much nutbread. If it's true, I'm very curious how it would have played. Logistically, it would seem more than a little awkward, but perhaps I'm just not imaginative enough.

Thanks for your help, Laura Sue! This whole thing has just been weighing on my mind, as you might imagine.

Obsessive/Compulsive

LAURA SUE RESPONDS:

Dear O/C:

I forwarded your letter to Michael Levine, director of THE QUEST. He's been gracious enough to address your query personally:

Laura Sue:

[major snip of industry pleasantries]

To answer the question... I think the viewer heard a twisted tale of what was supposed to be. At one point in an early draft, Gabrielle put the ambrosia on her lips and kissed Xena. A culmination of the earlier kiss I suppose. But we only shot it one way, and that was the way it aired. You can quote me if you'd like

Mike






Hi Laura,

I just read your NGR issue #14 and I'm saddened by the fact that Callisto's XWP career will end this season. I guess some GOOD things never last (pretty ironic). Anyways, I love your NGR! In fact it's my MOST favorite XWP website. You deliver NGR with style and with a sexy sense of humor -- I love it!

X-Jazz

LAURA SUE RESPONDS:

Dear X:

Don't cry for me, Argentina! There's still PLENTY of Callisto left! And what's left is Classic Stuff! I suggest that you video tape all the remaining Callisto eps, put them on a tape loop running 24/7 -- for yet another shrine to your goddess. After construction is completed, pay homage to her twice, no... make that FOUR times per day by kneeling and praying at her feet while uttering heartfelt gratitude that she was around for as long as she was! Laura Sue has a slight inclination to think that Hudson would really get off on the vision of thousands of Callisto Shrines across the globe -- and her devotees kneeling at the same four times each day to offer their undying love. Scary, very scary. A lot like her Burbank Con performance!

--LSD

(LSD apologizes to X and her readers. It's really not like her to be so cru-el, but sometimes ya gotta give 'em TOUGH-LOVE!)




Dear Laura Sue,

can I have your autograph for keep sake and I can say I talked to her before she was famous

--anon.

LAURA SUE RESPONDS:

Dear anon,

sure just see me at an upcoming convention or fan-fest and I will be happy to autograph anything you want me to, much like hudson does

--lsd



LAURA SUE NEEDS YOU!


If you HAVE any good dish, write me. Need a rumor confirmed, denied, or ambiguously tap danced around? I'm your gal! Just drop Laura Sue a line!

I can't print every letter, but I'll do my best to answer your questions... and report those late-breaking XWP stories!


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