_____________ ____________ ____________ * / R \ */ \ */ \ * | E ______ | *\____ ____/ *| ________/ * | S |******| | ****| |*** *| F |******** * | I | *| | *| | *| U |____ * | S ~~~~~~~ / *| I | *| T \ * | T ____ \ *| S | *| I ____/ * | A |*** \ \ *| | *| L |*** * | N | * \ \ ___*| |____ *| E | * | C | * \ \/ \ *| | * \__E_/ * \___/______________/ *\____/ ***** **** ************** ***** P.O. Box 7822 Oxnard, CA 93031 THE OFFICIAL ORGAN OF THE GALACTIC BORG CONSCIOUSNESS ISSUE NUMBER 21 June 1994 RESISTANCE IS FUTILE ("RIF") is published and edited by Oxnardus, Ripley, and Swannox for distribution on international, national and local electronic services, bulletin board conferences, and databases. Resistance is Futile is the official newsletter of the International Borg Club. Address listings, copyright notices, editorial notices, and information on back issues are printed at the end of this newsletter. All correspondence should be sent by e-mail to Oxnardus, Ripley, or Swannox (addresses given at end of newsletter) or mailed to "Resistance is Futile", P.O. Box 7822, Oxnard, CA 93031. ========= CONTENTS ========= FROM THAT PESKY EDITOR-IN-CHIEF: Staff Openings YOU WILL BE ASSIMILATED: Water Trek RADIOACTIVUS TAKES A BYTE OF THE BIG APPLE FROM ONE SIDE: Introduction, take 2 HITCH-HIKERS GUIDE TO STAR TREK: THE NEXT GENERATION [DON'T PANIC] Part 2 of 8 STAR TREK PARODY: Linterface [Interface] TNG 255 STAR TREK COMICOLOGY: Deep Space Nine #8 REQUIEM part 1. BORG INTERNATIONAL PEN PAL CLUB NEXT MONTH IN RIF Editorial Notices Copyright Notices Solicitations for next newsletter Back issues of RIF available Addresses of contributors =============================== FROM THAT PESKY EDITOR-IN-CHIEF =============================== Ever dream of being on the staff of an international Star Trek Fan Magazine? That dream can come true. I am now taking applications for help in editing, special features, and distribution. If you would be interested in joining the staff here at RIF, please e-mail me at K.TABORN@GENIE.GEIS.COM or OXNARDUS@THEREALM.COM with your explanation why YOU want to join the bandwagon. Beginning next month, RIF plans to go bi-monthly until after the December 1994 issue. We have been flooded with submissions and this will allow the numbering of the issues to match the months that RIF has been in publication. We love killing two birds with one stone. Also, I would like to ask readers to vote on their favorite articles in RIF. I want to begin work on the Best of RIF, volume 1. I would appreciate reader input on the selection of the contents. Just e-mail them to Oxnardus (address at end of newsletter) or mail them to the P.O. Box! ---Oxnardus, Editor-in-Chief (soon to be Executive Editor/ Publisher -- I hope! I hope!) ======================= YOU WILL BE ASSIMILATED ======================= by Swannox of Borg Water Trek ---------- Tonight, the crew of the Watertrek GRD (Goes Really Deep) encounter an offshoot species of Borg, the Borg Crabs! First Officer: "Captain" Captain: "Yes Number 1" First Officer: "I'm not number one" Captain: "Sorry, Wrong Show, What is it" First Officer: "The Watertrek has been invaded" Captain: "By Who" First Officer: "No, By What! Mechanical Creatures Captain: "Oh My God, The GRD has, CRABS!!!!!!! --We are sorry to report that this show has been cancelled due to the fact that the Borg won in this one!-- ========================================== RADIOACTIVUS TAKES A BYTE OF THE BIG APPLE ========================================== Hormones. An odd chemical reaction, acting on my organic body, causing strange happenings. This unit's move to the state of New York, for instance. Why the collective did not sense this aberrant behavior is beyond my master program's comprehension. So, after packing up my belongings, I left the circuit corroding rain of Washington state. What belongings could a Borg have? The inventory included, to name a few items, Jiffy Cube's "The Transformation of Picard to Locutus" etched Special Edition glass set, a case of "protect your leather even under a solar storm" rub-in cream, an emergency supply of Chex Mix (the original flavor, not that lame "improved" junk), and Oxnardus' business card. After just a few moments, I noticed a difference in the life forms who inhabit this "haven of all." There was the gentleman who took a woman's taxicab, thus relieving her of the high price she would have paid. And the man who helped the elderly life form with her bags. Why he was in such a hurry is still under investigation. Probably he had other good deeds to do that day. As my future Symbiotic Unit-For-Life drove me to his cube, I noticed other curiosities as well. A typical greeting while in the automobile is the extension of the middle digit of either hand skyward with the phrase "Up Oars" said loudly. We deduce it to mean "clear sailing ahead." The custom of "tailgating" is quite popular. Upon further research, I have discovered that "tailgating" means "a great party before or after a sporting event." New Yorkers must be big on sports. This is THE place for bargain shopping. Why, all a unit has to do is walk down the street and he/she/it is offered all sorts of merchandise. One such moment was when I was approached by a gaunt young man who offered to sell me Coke. Since I am a Pepsi drinker, I decided to decline the offer and move on. He seemed rather annoyed. Also, even for New York, the price was rather steep. Law enforcement officials are plentiful and are quick to inform you of your rate of travel. After a feat of deciphering mastery, I deemed the paper he handed me to be a ticket to a Met's game. I quickly disposed of it properly. After all...one should not let New York become littered. ---Radioactivus of Borg ============= FROM ONE SIDE ============= Unless you have perfect memory--and actually, Borg do--you probably don't recognize this column. If you do happen to fuzzily remember the title from somewhere (maybe about as clearly as you remember that good-looking Trill's comm number), you are certainly amazing. FROM ONE SIDE (FOS) began last summer as a continuing column, and managed disappear as fast as Q can-- without the annoying traits. FOS only lasted two or three columns last year. But now FOS is back to stay, hopefully for much longer than before! The only change is that the author has had a chance to become a year older, and she has lost a few more brain cells along the way! Other than that, FOS is the same. (But then, if you don't remember FOS, how can you know what hasn't changed?!) Now for what is hoped to be the most boring paragraph in any past or future FOS...the description paragraph. FROM ONE SIDE has no particular purpose or meaning, other than being entertaining. The author isn't quite sure about the spelling of "serious" and doesn't especially want to! Any good jokes (and sometimes bad ones, too) actually remembered long enough to get into a column will be, as will Trek-related newspaper articles (some on rather bizarre subjects!). Of course, most FOS columns will come as stories did to Lewis Carroll--he said that the title character from ALICE IN WONDERLAND walked up and tapped him on the shoulder! Finally, if anyone is bored enough to be wondering, the title to this column does have a smidgen of meaning. FROM ONE SIDE is not written by a member of the collective, but by a Bajoran. This particular Bajoran believes she is pale enough, and she does not wish to be assimilated...and to become gray! She is, however, in possession of a green card ("Nobody move! I've got a green card!"), and holds Resident Alien Status. She also has an awful tendency to babble, especially about herself! Well, that's it for this FOS. Hopefully, the next one will be considerably more interesting, and with some more humor! But for now...mission accomplished. ---Star (GENIE) ==================================================== HITCH-HIKERS GUIDE TO STAR TREK: THE NEXT GENERATION [DON'T PANIC] Part 2 of 8 ==================================================== by David T Lu and Mickey McCarter SCENE 3: [Last time, the Borg was just about to destroy the Heart of Gold, along with all of its crew, while the Enterprise helps out by making some tea ...] Data: Captain, I am getting some very strange readings. Picard: Explain. Data: Well, it appears that the Heart of Gold has suddenly disappeared, and the Borg has just turned into a sperm whale. Riker: What?! Data: The probability of the Borg's transformation is two to the power of seven trillion, one hundred forty seven million, eight hundred eighteen thousand, four hundred seventy three to one against. That is very improbable, sir. Riker: This could be a new offensive weapon that we have not yet encountered, Captain. Picard: Agreed. Torpedoes away! [Two torpedoes speed out from the Enterprise, one of which promptly turns into ten thousand scoops of whipped cream, covering the sperm whale. The other torpedo turns into a giant Frontanian mega-cherry, hitting the whale a second later.] Wesley: Wow! A giant banana split! Data: Captain, I am getting sporadic readings on the Enterprise. Picard: Sqeek-sqeek. Data: (crooking his head) Captain? [Data turns around from his console.] Data: Captain, may I inform you that you have turned into a small blue furry creature from Alpha Centauri. (turning to Troi) And you, counselor, have turned into Eccentrica Gallumbits, the triple-breasted whore of Eroticon Six. Riker: I'm glad to see that you're getting your hair back, sir. And Deanna, that extra breast suits you well. Data: Sir, the probability of you and Counselor Troi's metamorphosis is two to the power of six trillion, twenty seven million, four hundred forty three thousand, eight hundred ninety three to one against. Picard: Sqeeek!! Wesley: Ahhhhhhhhhh! Data: (turning to Wesley) Interesting. It appears that your console has just turned into an IBM PCjr. (looking back at his own console) And mine has just turned into a Commodore VIC 20. [Meanwhile, Worf has turned into a Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal, and quickly devoured one of the nameless officers on the back of the bridge, who, out of pure coincidence, happens to be wearing a red uniform today. Just before he vanishes into the fangs of Worf, however, a visual contact with the Bridge of the Heart of Gold was suddenly established for a split second, for no good reason other than that it's very very improbable. The rather bewildered face of Arthur Dent flashed across the main viewer. Interestingly, the only thought that crossed the unfortunate officer's mind at that moment, upon seeing Arthur's face, was "Oh no, not again!"] [The other officers, in blue uniforms, never met Arthur in their previous lives, and conversant with the creatures of the galaxy, quickly covered their eyes with their Starfleet-issued auto- inflatable towel-in-a-pip that they all wear on their collars.] Wesley: (calmed down, tentatively tapping his PCjr chicklet keyboard) Sir, the computer says that it's tired of opening, and closing, and opening, and closing, and opening, and closing, all the doors on the Enterprise, and that it's now setting course to Ursa Minor for a long-deserved vacation, at maximum warp. Picard: sqeek sqeek, sqeeeeek sqek sqeek! Troi: Captain, I am sensing a great deal of ... confusion, and ... anger ... from you. Are you feeling all right? (battering her eyelashes seductively and sliding her right leg along his furs) Is there _anything_ I can do to make you feel better? Picard: sqeek sqeeek sqeeeek! Riker: (staring at Troi) Captain, perhaps I should get Dr. Crusher? Picard: sqeek! Troi: Oh, all right. Wesley, call your mother. [Moments later, Dr. Beverly Crusher arrived at the bridge accompanied by five thousand Tribbles and a rather nasty Pogolarian snow blizzard.] [Commercial for Snuggles fabric softener ... of course.] SCENE 4: [Now, back to the Heart of Gold, the improbability level is still high, but rapidly coming down.] Trillian: (relaxing on a bean bag, Romulan Ale in hand, the drink rapidly eating through the mug that holds it) Well, the probability factor has come down to only two to the power of six million, two hundred thirty seven thousand, six hundred and sixty to one against. Everyone should be starting to feel better now. Arthur: (hanging in mid-air, in a rather soapy bubble bath) Whir ... what's going on? Where am I? What happened? (slight pause) I don't understand ... isn't there any tea to go with this bath? Zaphod: (fighting off a pack of Algonian turbo-turtles) Shut up, monkey brain, you and your tea almost got us killed. Hey, I'm still missing one of my heads! Eddie: Well, guys, how 'bout that! I sure got us outta that Borg mess in a hurry, huh? Man! I sure feel like a song right now. Let's see... any requests? It's request time, gang, and all of my lines are open right now. If there's anything that you'd like to hear, just ... mmm, what the ..., mmm, mmmmmm mmmm mmmm! Zaphod: (just finishing up applying Stick-O-Tape over Eddie's speakers) That oughta shut you up for a while. Ford: (drawing himself up from the deck with great difficulty) Wow, that was some hangover! Trillian: That's no hangover. Eddie just kicked in the improbability drive. Want some Romulan Ale? It'll make you feel better. Zaphod: Hey, give me some of that stuff. Trillian: Well, we're down to probability level two to the power of four thousand, six hundred eight to one against. Everything will be normal in a few more seconds. (pause) Where's Marvin? Marvin? [No answer.] Trillian: Marvin, where are you? [Still no answer.] Trillian: Eddie, where's Marvin? Eddie: mmmmm mmm mmmmmmm mmm-mmm mmmmm. Trillian: Oh, brother. Arthur: I think Marvin's missing. [An expression of deep genuine concern failed completely to cross both of Zaphod's faces.] Zaphod: Oh, who cares about that heap of junk metal, anyway? All he ever does is remind us how stupid that monkey-man is, as if we need to be reminded. Asking the ship's computer for a cup of tea when we're getting blown into bits ... Trillian: Okay! We are now back to normal. But where are we? Zaphod: Eddie, turn on the external cameras. Eddie: mm mmm mmm mmm-mmm m mmm mmmm-mmmm-mm mm-mmm mmm mmmmm! Zaphod: What's he saying? Ford: I think he wants you to ungag him first. Zaphod: Yeah, right. I'll just turn the cameras on myself! [Zaphod stumbles over to the console, examining it.] Zaphod: Hmmmm... anyone know what these buttons here do? [And, from outside the ship, a voice is heard ...] Voice: All right, open up! We know you're in there, and we've got you surrounded! Will the crew of the Enterprise be able to come to terms with their improbable transformations? Where's Marvin? Will Picard like his new hair? Does Deanna have to shop for a new wardrobe to match her new breast? Will Worf eat the Tribbles? And finally, who's holding the crew of the Heart of Gold prisoners? For the answers (in full color and stereo sound) to these, and many other, rather unimportant questions, watch for the next exciting episode of ... The Hitchhiker's Guide to Star Trek: The Next Generation! ================ STAR TREK PARODY ================ Hareware Productions presents "Linterface" A parody of ST:TNG's "Interface" TNG Production # 255 By Leonard Richardson TEASER: Picard: (voiceover) Captain's log, stardate 47215.5. We have been assigned to do a parody featuring Geordi, to avoid provoking the wrath of the NAACPians. Worf: Captain, the NAACPian warship is hailing us. Picard: On screen. Bob the NAACPian: (on screen) Where's Geordi? Picard: Um... he's in Engineering single-handedly saving the ship from certain destruction! Isn't that right, Mr. La Forge? Geordi: (over communicator) Yup. I've almost got it. Here Spot, kittykittykitty. Bob the NAACPian: Typical! Make the blacks do all the work! And how come he never gets laid? Picard: I dunno, maybe it's in his contract. Bob the NAACPian: Well, change his contract! You're providing a bad example for our youth! Picard: Whatever happened to family values? Bob the NAACPian: Same thing that happened to the family! Hurry up! Picard: Commander La Forge to the bridge, on the double. Geordi: Aye sir, right away. Geordi: (suavely) Is there a problem? Bob the NAACPian: They're ugly! Picard: Mr. Worf, fire on the NAACPian ship. Bob the NAACPian: Hey! Worf: With pleasure, sir. Bob the NAACPian: I'm telling Jesse Jackson about this! Picard: Good, now we can get on with the parody. Worf: Sir, we are being hailed by another vessel. Picard: Agh! On screen! Picard: Who are you? Research: I'm Research, from the NAAAP. Picard: What's that? Research: The National Association for the Advancement of Artificial Persons! We demand that this parody feature Data! Picard: Argh! It's already a Geordi parody! Research: If you don't make this a Data parody, we'll organize a protest! Theory: (on screen, behind Research) That's right! We'll boycott! Not one android will watch ST:TNG! Picard: Bug off. We're trying to do a parody here! Research: We're a designated minority group! You can't do this! Picard: (makes throat-cutting motion. Worf hangs up.) Worf: Sir, we are being hailed by another ship. Picard: What, another one? Worf: Yup. Picard: On screen. Shuttlecraft: I'm from the NAASC, and I'm here to tell you that we demand you center this episode entirely around the shuttlecrafts! Picard: (sticks out his tongue) THPPT! Shuttlecraft: All right! I warned you! Now we're going to fire on the ship in the atmosphere of that planet! Picard: What? Shuttlecraft: There's a ship in the atmosphere of that planet over there. We'll blow it to shreds if you don't comply with our wishes! Picard: All right, but only one scene. Data the Shuttlecraft: The Romulan shuttlecraft is uncloaking, sir. Picard the Shuttlecraft: Fire! Worf the Shuttlecraft: Yes sir. Shuttlecraft: Merely a token shuttlecraft scene! Beware Picard, we'll be back! Picard: Good, that's taken care of, now we can get on with the parody. Ensign Warren, plot a course for the planet with the ship in its atmosphere! We'll play some commercials until we get there. Engage! <> Crusher: OK Geordi, it's safe. Now, smoke this. Geordi: Huh? Crusher: To control the probe, you need to be in a certain type of trance. Smoking this joint will put you in that trance. Geordi: (looking at the joint) What's in it? Crusher: It's made out of belly-button lint. Geordi: Yuck. Crusher: Oh, don't worry about it, I've eaten hundreds myself. Geordi: Yeah, and look at you. Crusher: Hush! Light up! Geordi: Yech! Bleah! Crusher: No, smoke the other end. Geordi: Yech! Bleah! Crusher: Hm, maybe it just tastes awful. Geordi: You could say that. Crusher: It's working! TV Audience: So what? Rick Berman: (suddenly appearing) Quick! We have to think of something to get their attention, or they'll switch to FOX and watch "Married with Children!" Geordi: Look! James Borg, 007! James Borg 007: Rum and Coke, assimilated but not stirred. Don't forget to catch my new movie, "Cuberaker!" Geordi: I think they were all wiped out by some kind of power surge or something. Something: Arf! Arf! Geordi: Fifi! Bob the NAACPian: Stop! Stop the parody! Get that poodle out of here! Geordi: But we're not even to 150 yet! Bob the NAACPian: So what? Stop the parody! Leonard Richardson: (suddenly appearing) What's the problem? Bob the NAACPian: We're sick of the way you make fun of blacks! Leonard: What, didn't you notice? Bob the NAACPian: Notice what? Leonard: I make fun of everybody that way! Bob the NAACPian: Um... er... I knew that! We're sick of... er... the way you characterize blacks as lieutenant commanders named Geordi that can't see except with a VISOR and wear stupid suits that make them look like Borgs! Leonard: That wasn't me! That was Berman! Bob the NAACPian: And another thing! How come there aren't any black Borgs? Leonard: What would you say if there were? Bob the NAACPian: Probably something like "We're fed up with the way you portray blacks as mechanical killing machines with no fashion taste!" Leonard: In other words you just like to complain. Bob the NAACPian: Hey! I'm protecting justice here! Leonard: No you're not, you're complaining. Now go away. No more social commentary the rest of the parody! Bob the NAACPian: I'm staying! Leonard: Get out or I'll force you out! I'm the writer you know! Bob the NAACPian: All right! But I'll be back! Leonard: All right, on with the parody! Leonard: What was THAT? Sam the Cameraman: Oops. Dan Rather: In a bizarre twist of fate, all 3 camcorders being used to film the Hareware Productions parodies simultaneously exploded today. Murphy Brown has the story. Murphy Brown: This building houses the most sophisticated special-effects and sound computers in the world, which is strange because the special effects and sound suck. But this building is the home of some of the silliest ST:TNG parodies ever. And now they don't have any cameras. Dan Rather: In another bizarre twist of fate, RIB Productions, the other major manufacturer of ST:TNG parodies, also has no cameras. What is the probability of this happening? We asked Carl Sagan, probability correspondent. Carl Sagan: See, biiiiiiilyuns and biiiiiiiiilyuns of years ago... Dan Rather: Hey! That was Tasha! We're still in the parody! Murphy Brown: WE'RE NOT GETTING PAID FOR THIS! Announcer: And so, the parody ended up only having one scene with actual lint in them, and the NAAL got very mad and threatened to sue, and Geordi finally came to terms with the death of his poodle and it was all very touching but not very silly, and Worf decided that he rather liked being a shuttlecraft and decided to try and get in touch with his inner, shuttlecraftial self, which involved a lot of screaming and grunting and killing people in messy ways, and it was very loud and annoying and gross until somebody went out and bought the album of "K'nyuk'yuk Sings!" and played it over the sound system until Worf calmed down. Caption: THE END Next time, on Silly Trek: The Next Generation: Picard rebels against the Enterprise! Oh no! Does this have anything to do with what he ate for dinner? Find out next month in ... "Spambit Part 1" Q: (suddenly appearing) Hey! Waitaminute! I didn't get a cameo! Hey! Come back! It's not a silly parody without a Q cameo! The original and best! Hey! AAAAAAAARGH! ==================== STAR TREK COMICOLOGY ==================== by Swannox of Borg [Please note that the reviews of Star Trek, Issues 56 (January 1994) and 57 (February 1994) as continued from RIF 19 & 20 has been postponed until RIF 23 and 24. In it's place, we have this report and review from Swannox of Borg.] **NEWS** Malibu Comics has aquired the rights to Star Trek: Voyager and will be publishing it next year. Malibu already has the rights to Deep Space Nine. DC Comics, publishers of the Original Star Trek Crew Comic and Star Trek: The Next Generation are planning a crossover event with Malibu comics and the Deep Space Nine Licence. DC is planning on producing a two issue mini series, and Malibu will also produce a two issue mini series. Both #1's will be released in October and both #2's will be released in November. Both are planned for the same day, and will revolve around one story. DC Comics depending on the date this article is read is planning or already released a comic adaptation of the Final Episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation. The comic release will be the week of the final episode. **REVIEW** Deep Space Nine #8 REQUIEM part 1. (Reviewer's Note: in an attempt to save some of the suspense for those who would like to read this story, general descriptions will be the basis of this review) Again, as regular readers of the article are aware, the pace of the story moves seems hurried; things happen quicker than I would like to see. This issue has two story lines. There is a problem with the reactor core on DS9. Sisco calls in the former engineer of DS9, a Cardassian who O'Brien is forced to work with. While the two are in the guts of DS9, they find an area with a working personal generator and a diary. This leads to a side story with Kira trying to find out what happened to the writer of the journal. Kira goes on a personal vendetta to find this person, who turns out to be a child and daughter of a resistance leader during the occupation. She finds info from the Cardassian Engineer who knows of this child. We are left standing in a holosuite at the end with Kira and a program with a computer simulation of the child. Hanging Plots: (1) The rapid decay of the power and threat of radiation leakage; (2) Kira's search for more info on the child and what happened two years ago. Questions to ask yourself about the story: How Come this Cardassian has info on the child and her family. Is Quark hiding what he knows about this child. Next Review: Deep Space #9 plus more information concerning Trek Related Comics. ================= BORG PEN PAL CLUB ================= It has come to our attention that some Borg have been cut-off from the collective. So that they may again feel the comfort of our thousand of voices, we have instituted the BORG PEN PAL CLUB. Those Borg who fill compelled to write LAND MAIL letters are encouraged to write these Borg who have been forced to go without internet access. If there is interest, we could also run a pen pal internet exchange here as well. Until then....these are the Borg who wish to hear from other Borg via land mail: Bettina von Stockfleth Tricia Murphy Bettinus of Borg Tricius of Borg Pfenningsbusch 3 3560 Silver Park Pl. NE D-22081 Hamburg Salem, OR 97305 F.R. Germany USA Steve Villiers Leon Van Wageningen Falus of Borg Leonus of Borg P.O. Box 500 P.O. Box 1109 Taree 2430 32 20 BC Hellevoetsluis N.S.W. The Netherlands Australia ================= NEXT MONTH IN RIF ================= YOU WILL BE ASSIMILATED: Bumper Stickers Seen On The NCC-1701-E TRIBBLE TAGLINES SEEN IN CYBERSPACE Part 1 "*" HITCH-HIKERS GUIDE TO STAR TREK: THE NEXT GENERATION [DON'T PANIC] Part 3 of 8 STAR TREK PARODY: Spambit Part 1 of 2 [Gambit] TNG #256 ======================================================== SUBSCRIPTION SERVICE & LISTING OF RIF DISTRIBUTION SITES ======================================================== If you have an e-mail address at InterNet, Genie, NVN, Prodigy, AOL, Compu-serve, or FidoNet (or anything else that has a gateway to any of these services or is convertible to an Internet address), you can get on the RIF subscription list and have RIF sent to you via e-mail each month. Just e-mail your request to Oxnardus and your name will be put on the list. If you are not on Genie, be sure to send your InterNet address. Also, if you are a SysOp and you'd like to be a distribution site for RIF (and insure your copy of RIF one week prior to e- mail subscriptions!), please contact Oxnardus of Borg (addresses given below). BBS distribution centers (when you call, tell them you heard about their BBS from RIF!): Phone Name City ST SysOp ----------------------------------------------------------------- (405) 282-4676 THE Q CONTINUUM OK The Q (604) 574-1523 U.S.S. NEXUS BBS B.C. CAN Admiral Kirk (607) 777-4866 SUNY-BBS Binghamton NY Drew Halasz (616) 381-1124 THE X-FACTOR Kalamazoo MI Lord Vader (617) 864-3375 BCSM BBS Boston MA J. M. Tretakoff (618) 746-0916 THE ACCESS BBS Scott AFB IL C. Claybaugh (805) 854-2478 DA WARREN Arvin CA L. Richardson (805) 933-1345 QUACKIN' UP Santa Paula CA Jeff Mercer (805) 987-5506 BEYOND THE REALM Camarillo CA Musical ================= COPYRIGHT NOTICES ================== "RIF" acknowledges that Paramount Pictures and its various subsidiaries as having the sole rights to the Star Trek trademark and the holders of the Hitch-Hikers Guide to the Galaxy trademarks and copyrights as having sole rights to theirs. "RIF" has no intention to infringe upon any copyright or earn profit from this publication. The same is declared as to Hitch-HIker's Guide to the Galaxy. RIF is distributed free of charge. This newsletter may be distributed by anyone if kept intact and not altered in any way. Consider it shareware publishing! Resistance is Futile, copyright (c) 1994 by RIF BBS. ================================= SOLICITATIONS FOR NEXT NEWSLETTER ================================= The next Resistance is Futile will be released no later than July 1, 1994. Send submissions to Oxnardus, Ripley, or Swannox at the addresses notated below for consideration for a future issue. "RIF" is a non-profit fan publication. All submissions for publication should be sent to the editors. The editors retain editorial control and reprint privileges over the submitted materials and reserve the right to use the material in whatever way they deem appropriate. Submitted materials will not be returned to the sender. ============================ BACK ISSUES OF RIF AVAILABLE ============================ Missing an issue? Just e-mail Oxnardus which issue you want. we shall endeavor to send it out to you as soon as time permits. This is a volunteer outfit so it may take one day, it may take thirty years...but rest assured, you shall receive it! The requested issue will be sent to you via InterNet or Genie e-mail. If you do not have access to InterNet or any InterNet gateways, just send $2.00 per issue (for handling and postage) to RIF BBS, P.O. Box 7822, Oxnard, CA 93031. Please indicate which issue you desire. All back issues are available! ========================= ADDRESSES OF CONTRIBUTORS ========================= EDITORS: ------- OXNARDUS: Editor-in-Chief. Genie:K.Taborn; Prodigy:HCMH17A; InterNet: k.taborn@genie.geis.com OR oxnardus@therealm; MajorBBS: Narda@fnz; FidoNet: Oxnardus @ 1:206/2513; VirtualNet: 197 @ 1805020; WWIVNet: Oxnardus 115 @ 8500; AnarchyNet: Oxnardus @ 42:1005/1201; RipCity BBS, DA WARREN: Oxnardus; RIME: Kym Taborn [->1542]; US Mail: RIF BBS, P.O. Box 7822, Oxnard, CA 93031 RIPLEY aka Radioactivus: Editor, Big Cahuna West Coast. Genie:M.Samuels1; Prodigy:NRCR88A; InterNet: m.samuels1@genie.geis.com; RipCity BBS: Ripley. SWANNOX: Editor, Big Cahuna East Coast. Bitnet: Swann1@MUVMS6; Internet: swann1@muvms6.wvnet.edu; Prodigy: JPRN49A CONTRIBUTORS: ------------ Leonard Richardson: Internet: leonard.richardson@the-edge.com David T Lu: Internet: lulu@ucrmath.ucr.edu Mickey McCarter: Internet: mickey@brahms.udel.edu Star: GEnie: Star; Internet: star@genie.geis.com