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“Hero’s Heart”  Episode 61/402


Lexus [Lex]:  “Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.  I _lo-o-o-o-o-ve my money.  Who
are you?  Whaddya want?”

Fortune [For]:  “I’m Fortune-- goddess of luck.  You’re luck’s
been pretty good, Lexus, up till now.”

Lex:  “It’s not luck!  I’m a hard worker!  I-I hustle!  ‘Up till

For:  “Well-- you’ve made _no_ offerings to the gods to say,
‘Thanks for the good life.’  You haven’t used your good fortune
to help others-- and you’re supposed to do that.”

Lex:  “I know!  I know!  I’m-I’m a busy man!  I’ll-- fix it--
first thing.  Goodbye.”

For:  “Ho-ho-ho!  Not so fast.  First-- we’ll see if your good
luck continues.  I’ll toss my coin.  Heads, you win.  Tails,
you-- ya don’t.”

Lex:  “I could lose-- my money?!”

For:  “Yeah, but, uh-- it’s only money.”

Lex:  “‘Only money’?!  It’s my money!”

For:  “Uh-- OK, OK!  Don’t get hostile!  And your fortune will
be-- oh, oh-- sorry.  [Chuckles]  Now, now-- don’t get upset.  It
was a fair toss-- by the rules-- and don’t you yell.  Nobody
likes a sore loser.”

Taxman’s Voice:  “Open up, Lexus!”

Taxman:  “I’ve come about your taxes!”

Lex:  “Taxes?”

Taxman:  “You promised [?]!”

Lex:  “I don’t owe any taxes!”

Woman:  “What about the money you owe me?!”

Lex:  “I don’t owe you any-any money at all!  I-I paid that.”


White-haired Man [WM]:  “Hercules-- the people of Taphos are so
grateful!  [Chuckles]  We-- we no longer have to live with the
fear of bandits!”

H:  “Well, thanks, but I-I didn’t do it alone.”

W M:  “No.  Elias-- it must be wonderful to-- travel along with a
great hero like Hercules.”

I:  “Oh, yeah, it’s great.  I love it.  Just me and the big guy,
sharing that old, open road.  Ha-ha-ha-ha.”

Man’s Voice [In Background]:  “What would we do without

W M:  “If-if-if ever there’s anything, any of us can do for you,
you-you-you only have to ask.”

H:  “Thank you.”

W M:  “Bye.  Excuse me.  No, really-- ”

I:  “Excuse me.”

W M:  “Excuse me.”

I:  “You know?  Hercules-- I-- ”

A Man’s Voice [In Background]:  “There you are!  You old rascal,

I:  “I’ve noticed that your thanks are getting a _lot_ bigger,
whereas mine are kinda-- ”

H:  “Iolaus-- they know you’re a hero, and they appreciate you.”

I:  “Ah.”

A Man:  “You’re the man.”


Lex:  “Everything-- gone-- in a hearbeat.”

Lex’s Wife [L W]:  “You couldn’t help it, Lexus.”

Lex:  “Living with relatives-- how’s that gonna look?”

L W:  “But it’s only until you get on your feet, dear.  You’re a
smart man.  Now you’ll think of something.”

Lex:  “Big-shot brother.  Boy, is he gonna stick it to me.  What
is this?  We’re supposed to try and _cross_ on this-- hazard?!”

L W:  “Now, look-- we’ll be fine, dear.  Uh, be careful.”


I:  “I don’t know.  Just an ‘Atta boy, Iolaus-- that was great.’
Or, ‘Hey!  Good to see ya, Iolaus!  Thanks for your help!’  Or
maybe, ‘Iolaus-- who’s that big guy that always travels with
ya?’”  [They laugh]

L W’s Voice:  [Screams]


H:  “You’ll be all right.  Stay there.”

Lex:  “Help!  Help!  Somebody help me!  He-e-e-e-e-elp!”

H:  “I’ve got him.  Don’t worry!  I’m coming!”

Lex:  “Ah!  Ah!  Help me!”

H:  “Here-- give me your hand.”

Lex:  “I can’t.”

H:  “Come on.”

Lex:  “Ah-h!  I can’t-- hol-hold on!”

H:  “Yes, you can.”

I:  “Ah!  [Sighs]  Don’t move!  Don’t look down!  It’s all right.
I’ve got you.”

Lex:  “Oh-h-h.”

H:  “Hold on.”

Lex:  “Ah-h-h!”

I:  “Let go of the rope.”

L W:  “I can’t!”

I:  “Trust me.  Give me your hand.  Oh, no!  Don’t look down!”

L W:  [Screams]

I:  “No, no, no, no!  No!  I can’t get a grip on you if you keep
doing that!”

H:  “Come on!”

Lex:  “Ah!  Ah!”

H:  “Come on!”

L W:  [Screams]

I:  “No!  Ah-h-h!”

L W:  “Ah-h-h-h-h-h-h!”

I:  “OK!”

L W:  “Don’t let me fall!”

H:  “Give me your hand.  Come on.”

I:  “Stay still!”

L W:  [Screams]



I:  “What?!  What are you lookin’ at?!”

Woman’s Voice:  “Yes-- that’s him.  He’s the one who dropped

I:  “Yes.  It was me.  I dropped her.  She died.  And it was _my_

H:  “Iolaus.”

I:  “What?!”  [Sighs]

H:  “It wasn’t your fault.  The woman panicked.  There was
nothing you could do.”

I:  “I could have _not_-- dropped her.  You wouldn’t have.
[Sighs]  Hercules-- I always thought it would be-- _me_ that got
hurt taking too many chances, trying to be as much of a _hero_ as
you.  And now, somebody else pays the price.”

H:  “You were trying to help her.  You did all you could.”

I:  “I can’t let what happened happen again.”

H:  “What are you getting at?”

I:  “It’s over.  I quit.”

H:  “Quit?”

I:  “Yeah.”

H:  “What do you mean, quit?”

Man’s Voice:  “Let her go!”

Woman’s Voice:  “No!”

I:  “You can do this job by yourself!  You’re-- Hercules, and
I’m-- not.”

H:  “What-- _difference_ does that make?!  Think of all the good
we’ve done together.  We’re partners.  _And_ you’re my best

I:  “That’s not gonna change.  We can still be friends.  But if
you think you need a partner-- you better find someone else.”

H:  “You’re _not_-- listening to me!  You’ve _always_ been there
for me!  _Don’t_ take that away!  Maybe you just need a little
time to-- you know-- sort out your thoughts.  Here you go.”

Woman:  “Thank you, Hercules.  We are _so_ lucky to have a hero
like you.”

I:  “I guess my luck ran out.”

H:  “Iolaus!”


Innkeeper [Inn}:  “You don’t look so good.”

I:  “Yeah-- thought a little food might pick me up.  How’s the

Inn:  “Stew’s good.”

I:  “What?”

Inn:  “I hear you split with Hercules.”

I:  “Boy, news travels fast.”

Inn:  “It gets around.  Stew’s two dinars.”

I:  “Wait a second.  Before, at the celebration, aren’t you the
one that said, ‘Hey-- you guys-- come and eat at my place, any
time ya like-- my complements!”

Inn:  “Yeah-- ‘You guys’-- you _and_ Hercules.  But you ain’t
with Hercules, anymore.  Stew’s two dinars.”

I:  “I haven’t _got_ two dinars.”

Inn:  “Then you ain’t got no stew.”

I:  “You know?  If I had two dinars-- I wouldn’t spend it here.”


I:  “Come on.  You’ve gotta have _some_ job I can do!”

W M:  “Afraid not.”

I:  “I’ll clean.  I’ll sweep.  I’ll-- straighten out your loading

W M:  “I don’t _have_ a loading dock.”

I:  “Then I will _build_ you one.”

W M:  “Ha-ha-ha-ha.  [Sighs]  You, uh-- you broke with Hercules,

I:  “Does everybody know about that?”

W M:  “Pretty much.  Look-- retailing is tough.  Ya gotta be on
the ball.  Ya gotta have a clean record.  Have you ever been in
trouble with the law?”

I:  “Ah, you know-- just the ususal-- kid stuff-- when I-- was a

W M:  “Kid stuff?  What?  What kind of kid stuff?”

I:  “Well, I-- stole some stuff.”

W M:  “I’m sorry?  I didn’t hear what you said.”

I:  “I said, I _stole_ some stuff!  But, hey-- that’s great!  I
mean-- who better to protect you from thieves than a former
thief?!  I know all their tricks!  This is so simple, it’s

W M:  “I-- don’t think so.”

I:  “I have to do something!  I need dinars to-- to eat!  I’ll do

W M:  “Why don’t you-- try another town?”

I:  “Oh.”

W M:  “There are no jobs here in Taphos!”

I:  “Thanks for the advice!  I’ll-- chew on it.”

W M:  “Have a nice day.”


H:  “Iolaus.  Hi-- how you doin’?”

I:  “Great-- for a guy with no prospects.  It seems like running
those bandits out of this place doesn’t qualify as prior job

H:  “Iolaus, you don’t need a job.”

I:  “Yeah, well not in this town-- that’s for sure.  I’ve decided
to move on.  Get a-- change of scenery.”

H:  “King Trancas is expecting us tomorrow.  On the way, we’ll
talk about this.”

I:  “There’s nothing to talk about.”

H:  “Yes, there is.”

I:  “Hercules, I meant what I said.  I-I feel like I need a--
fresh start, or a-- new life.  You’re the one that said I should
take some time to sort things out.  Well, maybe that’s true.  I
just know that for now, I-- need a little space.”

H:  “OK-- if that’s what you want.  I’ll go on to see Trancas
alone and-- when I get back, we’ll talk.”

I:  “I don’t know where I’m gonna be.”

H:  “That’s all right.  I’ll find you.”


H:  “Fortune.  Oh-- I’m not ready for this.”

For:  “Ah-h-h-h-h-- I feel terrible.  What should I say?  ‘I’m
sorry’?  For starters.  Aw, that doesn’t seem like enough.  I-I
don’t know.  I-I-I’m at a loss for words.”

H:  “Now, that would be a first.”

For:  “No, you see?  It’s my fault-- that woman dying--
I-I-Iolaus blaming himself-- breaking up your partnership.”

H:  “W-w-wait-wait-- you’re-- you’re responsible for what

For:  “Well, ye-e-e-s, no-o-o-o.  I don’t know!  What do you
think?  Did I screw up?  Maybe I don’t wanna know.  Do I?  Oh-h.”

H:  “I have no idea what you’re talking about.  Look-- why don’t
you start at the 
beginning and, uh-- make it short.”

For:  “Well-- what’s to tell?  Lexus, he lost the toss.  Aw, he
was pretty sore, uh-h-h-- like I was pickin’ on him, like he
didn’t deserve it.  What else is new?  I was doin’ my job.  I
can’t make deals.  I got rules.  Break the rules and I could end
up goddess of, uh-uh-- dirt or something.”

H:  “OK, OK.  I’ve got is so far.  Could you, uh-- ?”

For:  “What?  Get to the point?”

H:  “Yeah.”

For:  “I can do that-- I think.  He loses his money.  They wind
up at the bridge.  She di-i-ies.  Iolaus feels responsible when
he’s not-- and I have to make things right.  Question is-- what
to do?”

H:  “The answer is nothing.  You-- do nothing.”

For:  “_You_ think I’m gonna screw it up!  That’s it!  Isn’t it?!
_You_ don’t think I can do it!  Whatever _it_ is-- ”

H:  “Fortune-- leave it alone.  Iolaus-- will be-- fine.”

For:  “OK.  Great.  I know when my input’s not needed!”

H:  “I-- hope I can count on that.”


[[[[[[I:  “It’s all right.  I’ve got you.  Trust me.  Give me
your hand.”  L W:  “I can’t!”  I:  “I’ve got you.”  L W:
“Ah-h-h-h!  Don’t let me fall!”  [Screams]]]]]]]

For’s Voice:  “You should listen to Hercules.”

I’s Voice:  “Who said that?”

For:  “I’m For-- ”

I:  “Who are you?”

For:  “I’m Fortune!  Goddess of luck!  Hercules said that your
friendship would see you _thro-o-o-ough_ this doubt.”

I:  “I love Hercules.  He’s like a brother to me.  I’d do
_anything_ for him.  But right now, I-- I wish I’d never met him!
If I hadn’t have-- I wouldn’t have been at that bridge.  He’d
have saved that woman-- and she’d be alive now, instead.”

For:  “Good.  Uh.  OK.  OK.  Now-- this isn’t exactly my
department-- but go with me on this.  What I’ll do-- is I’ll
_blank_ out your memory of what happened-- ’K?  That should set
your mind at ease.”

I:  “You could do that?”

For:  “Well, you don’t think I can?  Why did you say that?  Oh--
what if I can’t?!  But-- _I_ am in charge of winning and losing.
_You_ want to lose this memory.  _I_ can do that-- I think.”

I:  “Uh-- yeah.  OK.  Uh.”

For [Sighs]:  “OK-- now.  Remember earlier today-- you were
helping a couple-- at a bridge?  You and Hercules?”

I:  “Wait.  Who’s Hercules?”



I:  “And who are you?”

For:  “Oh-- someone who’s in big trouble.  Uh-- I guess you got
your wish.  It’s as if you’d never met Hercules.”


Drunk:  “H-hey.  H-hey, buddy.  H-how about a dinar?  Huh?”

I:  “Get off me!  Gee.  [Sighs]  So-- this is Nemea.  Hi.”

Woman:  “Hi, yourself, stranger.  Welcome to Nemea.  Why
don’tcha-- step into my office?”

I:  “Don’t you wanna see the color of my money?”

Woman:  “Honey, for you [Moans]-- I’ll run a tab.”  [They laugh.]



I:  “Hey!  Where are _you_ going?”

Woman:  “They _made_ me do it!  I swear!”

I [Laughs]:  “Come on.  Make yourself useful.  You wanna get
outta here?”


Woman:  “You’re not like any man I’ve ever known.  Where did you
come from?”

I:  “I don’t know.  That is the truth.  The last thing I
remember-- some pals and I were knocking over a jewelry stand.”

Woman:  “Mm-hmm?”

I:  “I must have been-- fifteen at the time.”

Woman:  “Mmmm?  Wherever you were since then-- you sure found out
what a girl likes.”

I:  “Yeah.  Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.  Come on.  When are ya gonna
show me around this place?  Entertain me?”

Woman:  “Are you bored?  Huh?”


H:  “Trancas, why don’t you-- just send an army escort with the

Trancas [Tra]:  “Because the mission’s got to stay secret-- and
you and Iolaus are-- better protection than a battalion of
regular army, anyway.  Say, where is Iolaus.”

H:  “Iolaus, uh-- was-- tied up-- a personal matter.”

Tra:  “Is he OK?”

H:  “Yeah, yeah-- he’ll be fine.  Tell me something.  Sending
this money to the people of Nemea is a --good thing, so, why all
the secrecy?”

Tra:  “Nemea’s government is on the verge of collapse.  I have
other-- allies-- kings, who would like to see that happen.  It
would be an easy conquest for them.  But-- since I’d like to keep
these-- other kings as-- allies instead of enemies, they can’t
know I’m sending aid.  You and this money may be the last hope
the Nemeans have.”


Tra:  “This is Spiro.”

H:  “Spiro-- Hercules.”

Spiro [Spi]:  “Ha-ha.  Hey.”

Tra:  “He trains the teamsters for my army.  He’s the best there
is.  Any problems on the road to Nemea-- you talk to Hercules.”

Spi:  “He’s the boss, sir-- till you say different.”

Tra:  “Good luck, Hercules.”

H:  “You can count on us.  We’ll be fine, Trancas.”


Men’s Voices:  “More mead here!”  “He’s been on a winning streak
all night.”  “He knows how to play his hand.”

Woman:  “Excuse me.”

Dingus [Din]:  “Ha-ha-- your luck’s over.  This is mine.”

I:  “Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah.”

Din:  “Wait a minute!”

I:  “What do they call you?  What-- do they call you?  Huh?”

Din:  “Dingus.”

I [Chuckles]:  “That’s wrong.  Wrong!  Wrong!  Wrong!  Wrong!
Wrong!  They call _you_-- loser.  Loser.  Loser.
Lo-o-o-o-o-oser.  Huh?  [Chuckles]  We had a good game?  Didn’t
we-- Dingus?”

Din:  “Yeah.  Yeah.”

I:  “Mead for everybody!  On me!”

Zeno:  “Bring him over here.”

Thanatos [Tha]:  “My boss wants to see you.”

I:  “Hey-y-y-- come on.”

Woman:  “This guy-- is Thanatos.  He works for Zeno.  I want no

I:  “Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh-h-h.”

Zeno:  “Welcome to my place.  Sit.  Eat.  I am Zeno.  I think I
have a place in my business for you.”

I:  “What kind of business?”

Zeno:  “You go with Thanatos tomorrow.  Call on a-- client.”

I:  “Nice place you got here.”


H:  “You handle the team well, Spiro.”

Spi:  “My wife says I think like a horse.  What does she mean by
that, huh?  [Laughs]  So Hercules, what’s the story?  I thought
you got a partner.”

H:  “Not this time.”

Spi:  “Hey-y-y-- I’m pretty handy.  Maybe you and me get to kick
some Nemean butt before we finish this trip.”

H:  “You don’t like Nemeans?”

Spi:  “They lie and cheat and steal.  Aside from that-- no

H:  “There’s a-- fork in the trail up ahead.  Go south.”

Spi:  “That trail’s pretty rough.”

H:  “Too rough?”

Spi:  “Not if it’s the way you want to go-- ”

H:  “Well, in case there’s trouble, I know the south way better.”

Spi:  “Trouble?  Nemeans?”

H:  “You never know.”

Spi:  “Yeah-heh-heh-hey!  Chk!  Heeyah!”


Tha:  “Zeno wants his fifty dinars.”

Merchant:  “Oh, listen to Mr. Death.  Fifty dinars?  Why not a

Tha:  “That would be OK.”

Merchant:  “Uh-- no, I’m tryin’ to make-- a point?  You see?  I
don’t _have_ fifty dinars.”

Tha:  “That’s-- real bad.”

Merchant:  “Oh-h-h-h.  Oh, I-I-I-- I’m-- I’m deathly a--fraid of

I:  “Dead-- he pays us nothing.”

Merchant:  “Uh, uh-- friend-- you-- you can’t get blood from--
a-a turnip.”

I:  “No, friend-- but he can get blood out of you.  And he will--
if you don’t pay up.  I can only hold him back for so long.”

Merchant:  “Look, I-I-- could come up with-- twenty-five?”

I:  “I think you-- better get it.”

Merchant:  “Tell-- Zeno-- I promise-- I’ll have the other
twenty-five tomorrow.”

I:  “Oh, no, no, no, no-- tomorrow-- you still owe him fifty.
This just gets you through today in one piece.”


Spiro:  “Wagon’s not built for this.  It’s on-- but not by much.”

Ara:  “Hello?  Could I ride with you for a way?  I’m awful

H:  “Of course you can.  Are you-- travelling out here alone?”

Ara:  “I’m going home to Nemea.  My, um-- my husband died of
fever and I’m-- trying to get to my parents’ house before it’s
time for the baby.”

H:  “Well, then, we-- better hurry up.”

Ara:  “Thank you.”


Tha:  “This guy had that nitwit so scared of me, I thought he’d
die of fright.”

Zeno:  “Twenty dinars.  Not bad.  What do you think, Iolaus?”

I:  “What do I think?  I think he gave us twenty-five dinars.  I
think this guy’s stealing from you.”

Tha:  “I’m going to cut you _three_ ways-- ”

I:  “Yeah-- I know-- deep-- wide-- and frequent.  But first-- we
gotta get straight about the rules.”

Tha:  “Rules?  What-- rule-- ?!”


I:  “There are no rules.”

Zeno:  “I was right about you, my friend.  You’re my new
number-one man.”



Tha:  “This is not right, Zeno.”

Zeno:  “I always knew you were skimming.  But to do so openly is
a sign of disrespect!  This I cannot-- ignore.”

Tha:  “This is not right!”

Zeno:  “Loyalty-- it’s almost a thing of the past.  Nobody these
days-- seems to care.  Can I trust you, Iolaus?”

I:  “Long as you pay me.”

Zena:  “Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.  At last-- an honest man.  Old Diogenes
would be pleased.  But I sense, there’s more to the man than--
need of a payday.”

I:  “You can count on me, Zeno.”


Ara:  “You look concerned.”

H:  “I’d like to scout farther ahead, but I-- can’t leave the
wagon unprotected.”

Ara:  “Well, you can’t be in two places at once.”

H:  “Usually, that’s-- not a problem.  I, uh-- have a friend.
We-- back each other up.  It-- feels odd-- not having him here.
We’ll be fine.  Well, that looks-- comfortable.”

Spi:  “The wagon’s not made for soft riding.”

H:  “You surprise me, Spiro.  You know?  She’s-- from Nemea.”

Spi:  “Oh-- I don’t know about you, but I got no itch to be a
midwife-- partner.”

H:  “Mm-hmm.”

Spi:  “What?!  Huh?”


Tha:  “I’ve _always_ been a good soldier!  I did _everything_
Zeno ever asked!  This is how I’m rewarded.  You’re _out_,
Thanatos.  No-- it’s you who’s out, Zeno.  We’re taking over--
Zeno’s rackets-- his-- business!  As for Zeno-- there’s a cold
spot in the swamps for him-- him and his new number-one man--
this-- Iolaus.”


Ara:  “Is it OK?”

H:  “Uh-- it doesn’t look too bad.”

Ara:  “Oh-- good.”

H:  “So, uh-- Spiro is Trancas’ best man-- yeah.  No-- don’t--
do-- that!”

Ara:  [Screams]

H:  “I said, ‘Don’t do that.’”

Spi:  “Oh.”

Ara:  “Help!  Help!”  [Screams]

H:  “Got it!  Whoa!”

Ara:  “Oh!  Oh!”  [Pants]

H:  “Whoa!  Who-o-o-o-o-oa!”  [Sighs]

Ara:  “Oh!  Oh!”

H:  “Are you OK?”

Ara:  “No!”

H:  “Hang on.  We’re almost home.”


Zeno:  “A wagon full ’a dinars-- like a plum ripe for the

I:  “So what’s the plan?”

Zeno:  “I’ve had a scout keeping track of the wagon for some
time.  I’ve hired muscle for the job.  What I haven’t had till
now was someone to lead them-- someone-- I could trust.”

I:  “I won’t let you down, Zeno.  So, what are we up against?
How many guards?”

Zeno:  “One guard.”

I:  “What’s the catch?”

Zeno:  “The one guard-- is Hercules.”

I:  “Ha-ha.  One guy.  It’s one guy.”

Zeno:  “Ha-- such audacity.  But don’t underestimate Hercules.
He’s the equal of ten, twenty-- perhaps a hundred ordinary men.
But then you, my friend-- are not ordinary, are you?”

I:  “The wagon-- and the money-- are ours.”


I:  “The big guy’s Hercules.  Take him first.”

Thug’s Voice:  “Right.”

Ara:  “Oh.”

H:  “You guys in-- town for the convention?”

Spi:  “Way to go.”

Ara:  “Thanks.”

Spi:  “No worries, Herc!  I’ve got your back!”

H:  “How comforting.”


H:  “Iolaus.”

I:  “How did you know my name?”

H:  “Know your name?  Of course I know your name.  What are you
talkin’ about?”

I:  “So-- you’re Hercules.  Pretty impressive.”

H:  “What are you doing?”

I:  “Come on.  Let’s see what you got, huh?  I thought you were
tough!  Ah-h-h!  Ah!”

H:  “I’m not gonna fight you.”

I:  “Come on.  Give me something!  What?  Are you afraid of me?!
Ah-h-h!  Ah!  Huh?!  Come on!  Come on!”

H:  “What has happened to you?  Don’t you know who you are?”

I:  “I know enough to make you bleed.  Ah-h-h!”

H:  “You may not know who you are-- but I do.”

I:  “Ah-h-h-h!”



H:  “I knew you wouldn’t hurt me.”

I:  “I don’t even know why I didn’t.”

H:  “Because you’re my best friend.  You have been for years.”

I:  “I never laid eyes on you before.”

H:  “I want some answers.  And I want them-- now!”


Tha:  “Your place.  Your business.  All-- mine.”

Zeno:  “You’ll find being boss is less than you expect, Thanatos.
You’ll fear each stranger-- looking for one like you.  Then one
day-- he’ll be there.  And it’ll be _your_ time.”

Tha:  “I’ll be smarter.  My time will be a long time coming.  Now
come on, old man-- we’ve got work to do.”


Ara:  “Oh.”

H:  “Careful.”

Ara:  “Ooh-- thanks.”

H:  “You’re welcome.”

Ara’s Voice:  “Thank you-- for me and for my child.”

Ara:  “I can’t wait till he’s old enough to hear my adventure
with Hercules.”

H:  “He-- you’re-- sure it’s a boy?”

Ara:  “The oracle said it would be, and I hope it is.  I’ll name
him after his father.”

H:  “Good luck, Ara.  Oh, wait.  You-- know this town.  Have you
heard of a man named Zeno?”

Ara:  “Everyone in Nemea knows of Zeno.”

Man’s Voice:  “We have money to give away.”

Ara:  “You’ll find him near the tavern-- east side of town.”

H:  “OK.”

Ara:  “Goodbye, Hercules.”

H:  “Goodbye.”

Spi:  “Nice lady.”

H:  “Yeah, she’s all right-- uh, for a-- Nemean.”

Spi:  “All right, all right-- I got your point.  I was wrong.
The king’ll be pleased.  Take care, Hercules.”

H:  “You, too.  Travel safely, Spiro.”

Spi:  “Thanks.”


Man’s Voice:  “This way!”

Woman:  “Hi.”

A Man’s Voice:  “You got a light?”

Woman:  “Hmm.”


H:  “Hello?  Zeno.”

I:  “Zeno’s not here.”

H:  “Actually-- I was looking for you.  I’m gonna help you.”

I:  “I tried to rob you.”

H:  “You didn’t know what you were doing.”

I:  “I knew _exactly_ what I was doing.”

H:  “You’ll understand-- when I explain it to you.”

I:  “Yeah, well, it’s gotta wait.  I’ve gotta get Zeno before
they kill him.”

H:  “Who’s got him?”

I:  “The guy I replaced.  He’s taking him to the swamp, where
they hide their mistakes.”

H:  “Iolaus-- why are you helping Zeno?  He’s a criminal.”

I:  “Yeah-- he’s a criminal.  He’s my friend.”


Tha:  “Be sure to save some room down there for your pal.  He’ll
be along soon.”

I’s Voice:  “Thanatos!”

H:  “Thanatos?  He has a name that means death?”


H:  “Iolaus!”

I:  “What?!  Here!  Ah-h-h!  What is this?!  Ah-h!”

H:  “Oh, yeah!”

I:  “Oh!  Cool.  Zeno.  Here-- wait for my signal.”

H:  “One pull.  Two pulls, I’m comin’ in after.”

I:  “OK.  Zeno!”

H:  “Iolaus.  Iolaus!”

I:  “Come on.  Come on.  That’s it.  Come on.”


Zeno:  “I was right about you from the start.  You’re a stand-up
man.  I owe you my life.”

I:  “I didn’t pull you out of that swamp so you could spend the
rest of your life in prison.”

Zeno:  “Hercules said I had a lot to answer for-- things I’ve
done-- and he’s right.  I have a debt-- and I have to pay it.”

I:  “I just wish there was some way I could help you.”

Zeno:  “There is-- find yourself another line of work.  This
one’s a dead end.”

H’s Voicer:  “Good advice.”

I:  “Another line of work?  Maybe.”

H:  “I’ve got one in mind.  Ready to get your life back?”

I:  “I don’t know.  What’s it gonna cost me?”

H:  “How about one dinar.”

I:  “Aw, great.  My life is worth _one_ dinar.”

For’s Voice:  “Very clever, Hercules!”

I:  “Ah!  Uh!  Who are you?!”

For:  “Mmm-- depending on how it goes-- your best friend-- or
your worst nightmare.  I’m sorry-- but Hercules said do nothing.
But I couldn’t do nothing, so I had to do something, and-- it
just didn’t work out.”

I:  “I am surrounded by people I do _not_ understand!”

For:  “I wiped out your memory!  You wanted a fresh start!  Ya
gotta admit!  This is the mother of all fresh starts.  Ha-ha-ha.
Ooh, sorry.  I-I-I was just tryin’ to help.  I-- I should ’a
known better.”

H:  “Fortune-- today.”

For [Sighs]:  “Always in a rush.”  [Sighs]

I:  “Hey-hey-hey!  Hey, Hercules!”

H:  “Welcome back, buddy.”

For:  “Good luck, Iolaus.”

H:  “So, uh-- this is you-- right?”

I:  “No.  [Laughs]  Wait a minute.  Hercules, I remember
everything.  I dropped that woman-- then I did those terrible
things.  I can’t believe this.  I behaved like a common

H:  “Come on, listen.  Didn’t you jump into that swamp?  Risk
your life to save Zeno?”

I:  “Well-- yeah.”

H [Interrupts]:  “Well-- there’s nothing common or criminal about
that.  Right?”

I:  “I guess.”

H:  “Come on.”

I:  “But I robbed.  I stole.  I even tried to kill you.”

H:  “You lost your memory.  You didn’t know yourself.  But your
heart drew the line at real evil.  You could never take my life.”

I:  “No.  No, you’re right.  You know what?  I can’t forget that
woman’s face.”

H:  “Of course, you can’t.  And you never will.  You did
everything humanly possible to save her.”

I:  “I tried.”

H:  “That’s all any of us can do.”

I:  “Hercules?”

H:  “Hmm?”

I:  “Thanks for believing in me.”

H:  “Ah.  That’s what friends are for.”


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